"All who gain power are afraid to lose it" — Chancellor Palpatine, Star Wars - Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
// Just a blog among many others //
"Et comme dirait Grucho Marx : 'Si vous n'aimez pas mes opinions, j'en ai d'autres !'" (Jean-Jacques Jespers)
// This is a blog that is updated on a daily basis (if I have time, though…) and on which I feature things that I find funny. Enjoy and don't hesitate to post comments as well!
Randy Pear (Jon Lovitz) is on a family vacation with his wife, Bev (Kathy Najimy), son, Jason (Brody Smith), and daughter, Kimberly (Jillian Marie Hubert). Desperate to get rich so he doesn't have to work at Home Depot any more, he joins the race without telling Bev or his children why they are rushing from Las Vegas. He instead informs them that he has a job interview in Silver City for filling ink pens. He is so desperate to get there that he does not stop to allow the kids to go to the toilet, having Kimmie excrete out the window, where it hits a police car. The daughter then spots a sign saying "Barbie Museum", and Bev insists that they have to stop and give the kids a break. Randy reluctantly agrees. The barbie museum turns out to not be about the doll, however, and instead a shrine to the NaziKlaus Barbie run by neo-nazis. The Pear Family, who is Jewish, flees in terror, only to find their car has been sabotaged by the Cody Brothers. So Randy steals nothing less than Adolf Hitler's car from the museum and they drive that.
"Are you insane? This is Hitler's car!"
I found an extended version of the scene, but it's in German. Notice that Mr. Pear curses German cars…
"We have to attend a bookburning…"
Now let's make fun of evil Hitler: someone took one of the scenes from Der Untergang and put fake humorous subtitles on it…
"Everyone that's not a retard leaves the room now" --> LMAO
Uncyclopedia featured articles: one of the leaders of the Axis of Evil-Doers, Adolf Hitler, and Benedict XVI (aka Darth Ratzi, Palpatine's best friend).
Hitler, keeping his pimp hand strong, "You must be this tall to join the Nazi party".
Jeremy Clarkson, James May and Richard Hammond organise an epic race from Surrey to Monaco to see if taking the trip in an Aston Martin DB9 is faster than taking the train. How silly they are! But that's the whole point, I think.
Since we're in a kind of Indy week, I propose you watch this brilliant song parody based on the Raiders March theme by the god of composers, John Williams. Let's watch first a music video with fragments from the first three films.
Infamous presentor Jeremy Clarkson introduces us to the G-Wiz, a really crappy electric car:
"This has no redeeming features, it has no headroom, it has no leg room, it has no space for a passenger alongside me and God has not yet created a creature who would fit in the back! (…) You can't stop cause that'll wear the battery down… (…) The message then is clear: if you want to die horribly and in great pain while keeping Britain wet and miserable, get a G-Wiz. If on the other hand you want something strong, and safe and quite a lot faster than a G-Wiz, get yourself a table."
Indiana Jones hit the screen today in Belgium, and since I'm one of his biggest fans I had to go and see the movie today. So I decided to take a break in this rather long and tiresome period preceding the first exam and I went to the cinema. I was expecting a huge crowd of Indy freaks, but it appeared that only two dozens of people had come! Anyway, that's not a problem.
I really enjoyed Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, but I won't write a lot about it right now, because I'm running out of time and because I prefer not to disclose to much information about the plot and so on. I'd just like to say that this film won't appeal to people who have never seen the other episodes, for it's full of references and "Easter eggs". The plot was terrific, except that a couple of scenes were too unrealistic… Yet, this film was great and I'm looking forward to seeing it once more after the exams. If you liked the other Indiana Jones movies, go to the cinema asap!
I suppose most of you won't have the opportunity to go to the cinema before a month or so, and that's why I thought that listening to John William's great music would be fine meanwhile. I hope you'll notice the many hints to the other films.
I bet you're wondering right now what this entry's title refers to. In fact it is the first instance of the new Dutch licence plate code that has just been released yesterday by the RDW (Rijksdienst Wegverkeer, whose Belgian equivalent is the DIV – Direction pour l'Immatriculation des Véhicules / Dienst voor de Inschrijving van de Voertuigen).
Several months ago, I remember mentioning the fact that the RDW had started issuing the last letter of the so-called "side-code 6" (i.e. the "99-XX-XX" type, with two digits followed by two groups of two letters). For months, Dutch people had been wondering when the new series would be issued, which had a negative impact on the sales of new cars, since everyone was waiting for the introduction of that new code.
Indeed, each vehicule in the Netherlands (except for bicycles) gets a licence plate that will always stay on it, even if the vehicule is sold, etc. In Belgium, quite the contrary, licence plates are linked to a person, so when s/he buys a new vehicule, s/he may keep the same plate number. (This stems from the fact that you can still spot so many of those old licence plates that you can hardly read…) Anyway, let's get back to the Netherlands: car sales diminished due to people waiting to the new code. The reason is that, when you have a car with a former "side code" (e.g. 22-SL-XP), it will immediately strike as older than the current "side code" (e.g. 39-GBG-7), which is a psychological obstacle for a possible future buyer.
Anyway. My point was to share that piece of useless information with you. For more details, I refer you to the following article:
01-GBB-1: na 57 jaar verandert kenteken personenauto Zoetermeer, 19 mei 2008 Vandaag verschijnt na 57 jaar een volledig nieuw kenteken op de personenauto’s. Verkeersminister Camiel Eurlings reikt samen met Johan Hakkenberg, algemeen directeur van de RDW, het eerste personenautokenteken uit met twee cijfers, drie letters en één cijfer. De energiezuinige Volkswagen Golf van de heer Antonides uit Ermelo draagt het kenteken 01-GBB-1. De uitreiking vindt om 11.00 uur plaats bij het Instituut voor Automobiel Management (IVA) in Driebergen.
Nieuwe combinatie na 57 jaar Voor het eerst bestaat het kenteken uit twee cijfers, drie letters en één cijfer. Deze combinatie is in 2002 na onderzoek van TNO naar voren gekomen als de best te lezen en te onthouden combinatie. Vanaf 1951 gebruikte Nederland alleen tweetallen van letters en cijfers. 57 jaar later zijn alle geschikte kentekencombinaties hiervan op. Met de nieuwe combinatie kunnen ongeveer 3 miljoen voertuigen een nieuw kenteken krijgen. De RDW is onder meer verantwoordelijk voor het beheer van het kentekenregister en de afgifte en inname van kentekenplaten.
Unieke registratiewijze Het kenteken is belangrijk voor de handhaving van verkeersveiligheid en de opsporing van criminaliteit. Via het kenteken zijn immers alle technische gegevens en de gegevens van de eigenaar/houder te achterhalen. Hierdoor kan die aangesproken worden op zijn weggedrag, de technische staat van zijn voertuig, de verzekeringsplicht, de APK-plicht en motorrijtuigenbelasting. Ook bij andere vormen van criminaliteit is het kenteken een goed hulpmiddel om de dader te achterhalen. Al met al een unieke registratiewijze waar het buitenland met bewondering naar kijkt. Daarnaast speelt het kenteken en het kentekenregister een rol in ‘Anders Betalen voor Mobiliteit’. Daarom is het van groot belang om een betrouwbaar en fraudebestendig kentekenregister te hebben.
Goed vastschroeven Omdat er zoveel afhankelijk is van het kenteken, vindt minister Eurlings het belangrijk dat iedereen de kentekenplaat goed vastzet om het risico van diefstal of verlies te verkleinen. “Er verschijnen regelmatig berichten dat steeds meer kentekenplaten gestolen worden. Dat is linke soep, dan moet je zelf nieuwe kentekenplaten aanvragen om niet op te draaien voor overtredingen die een ander met jouw kenteken begaat. Daarom zal ik deze nieuwe kentekenplaat extra goed vastschroeven.”
Verboden combinaties In de nieuwe cijfer-lettercombinatie worden helemaal geen klinkers gebruikt. Ook de letter Y doet niet mee. Gebruik van klinkers maakt de kans op maatschappelijk onaanvaardbare of grievende lettercombinaties te groot. Ook worden de letters C en Q niet gebruikt, omdat deze letters teveel op een nul lijken. De W en O staan alleen als eerste letter op de plaat van een caravan, aanhangwagen of een oplegger. Daarnaast worden ook de zes lettercombinaties GVD, NSB, TBS, LYK, SS en SD niet gebruikt.
I'd like to point out that Belgian licence plate will undergo a great change this year (I predict that to happen in October): the two groups of three letters and three digits will be reversed, resulting in plates like "111-AAA". Note that the first group will never start with a zero so as to avoid confusion with the letter O (used for oldtimers). However, it seems that almost no one knows about this change, so it won't have an effect on car sales as in the Netherlands. Isn't that a bit weird? (Yeah I know: I am weird.)
James Bond has an adept:
I found a video commenting on the proposal of a Tweede Kamerlid to allow car owners to get vanity plates. The reporter investigates in a licence plate factory.
The "watch scene" is one of my favourite ones in Pulp Fiction: Captain Kroon's monologue played by Christopher Walken.
"He'd be damned if any slope's gonna put his greasy yellow hands on his son's birthright. So he hid it in one place he knew he can hide something: his ass."
--> Brilliant line!
Here's the French version of the same scene, with Walken dubbed by Bernard Lanneau, who is the "official French voice" of Kevin Costner and Dennis Quaid.
Perhaps I should have thought about it on St Patrick's Day, but it's only today that I've had the idea to google the following video on YouTube. It stars Porky Pig who is looking high and low for refuge in Ireland, and he ends up in a castle owned by leprechauns… (According to Uncyclopedia, leprechauns are "little magical hoppity green creatures commonly confused with the Irish.")
"Le-le-le-le-leprechauns! What nonsense!"
I love Porky's look at 03:42. The green shoes dance is just fantastic, by the way.
"I really must be going… I'm late for an appointment… with me-me-my psychiatrist…"
That was a quite surreal cartoon, don't you think?
Going to the toilet isn't a nightmare anymore for women who are afraid of germs on the seat:
It was unavoidable that I show you, after the world's cleanest toilet, the world's most disgusting "toilet":
"Ants, beetles, mosquitos, fleas, spiders… Oh! Several congrate! (…) A toad! (…) And we've got toilet paper!" / "That's a shit box!"
Yet, there's hope: the Viper, the state of the art in the domain of flushing huge piles of [INSERT WORD HERE]:
For those of you who think they waste a lot of clean water when flushing, the following video will prove that you're wrong: it is possible to waste more. Check this out
A comment on YouTube:
"That's not a toilet that's a washing machine" --> So true!
Today's Uncyclopedia featured article: the toilet (and the Pee Review, as a bonus)
This blog entry's title refers to the following sketch from Little Britain:
A very gifted film editor on YouTube came up with this re-cut trailer: shots from Tim Burton's 1989 Batman with the audio from The Dark Knight.
Wasn't that brilliant? According to me, the best bits is "Why so serious?" and "I like that": Jack Nicholson's facial expression is perfectly tuned with the audio.
The second trailer has eventually been released, so enjoy it!
Please watch this other version of the Dead Parrot sketch that was performed by John Cleese and Michael Palin at the first Amnesty International Secret Policeman's Ball in 1976:
Our General linguistics exam is in fact a so-called [neutral use ;-) SL] "take home exam". One of the proposed questions — because we are to pick two of them out of a set of six — requires us to analyse, among others, the phenomena of hyper- and misunderstanding in the sketch "Customer attacks Jane Eyre", aka "Balls!" from A bit of Fry and Laurie.
Just in passing, I would like to highligh a commentary that has been dropped on this video:
More TV trailers are to be seen on the official website. I'm really looking forward to watching that movie. I'm so eager that I'll sacrifice an afternoon in my study period to go to the cinema on 21 May when it is released. (Some call this day "InD-Day"!)
The Cat Concerto is perhaps one of the most popular short cartoons ever created. In 1947 it received the Academy Award for Best Short Subject: Cartoons. It "stars" Tom (the cat) as a piano virtuoso giving a recital on the instrument Jerry (the mouse) lives in.
I LOVE Tom's face at 03:43 and the way the piano lid is slammed onto his fingers…
The same year MGM produced The Cat Concerto, Warner Bros. released a very similar cartoon entitled Rhapsody Rabbit. Directed by Friz Freleng, Rhapsody Rabbit featured Bugs Bunny opposite an unnamed mouse. Both shorts had very similar plots, and even use the same piece by Liszt.
Both MGM and Warner Bros. accused each other of plagiarism, after both films were shown during the 1947 Academy Awards ceremony. Technicolor was accused of sending a print of either cartoon to the competing studio, who then allegedly plagarized their rival's work.
Problem Child is a film I used to watch a lot when I was a little boy, because it's about an eight-year-old monster that always behaves badly… The film starred the late Jack Warden (as Big Ben Healy) and John Ritter (as Ben Healy). The devilish Junior is played by Michael Oliver. Today I'd like to show you the baseball scene. Enjoy.
I know I've already featured the following scene, but I like it very much:
Here's the trailer of Coneheads, a movie which I like very much but which I haven't had the opportunity to watch for several years. Fortunately, I've got the DVD and I'll watch it in July or August. Till then, I can enjoy the trailer. From the Wikipedia entry (slightly edited):
Coneheads has been said to have made an "accidental" or "unintentional" political statement or social commentary about the nature of the immigrant experience in America, the filmmakers' ostensible intent being merely to entertain.
The film's plot premise: the adventures of the Conehead family — whose ship, as part of an advance scouting mission for an invasion, is shot down by a F-16 fighter-interceptor of the New Jersey Air National Guard, and they try to assimilate into American society and pursue the immigrant's American dream.
A video which was quite popular on YouTube is the following one:
In fact this had been shot in 2006 — Standard didn't win that year — and turned into a joke. However, Standard did a much better season this year, and they eventually got the most awaited (i.e. for 25 years) Belgian Ligue title (or whatever I should call it). Now the guy in question, Luc Sacré, has gained into popularity and has even been invited to comment on several matches. And we can guess he finally bought a new scarf…
I don't know if I should call that a pathetic behaviour… After all, we have the right to have a hobby, be it completely silly — and I am a fine example of such a concept. Nevertheless, I think you will find the following video quite pathetic:
Un vieux frânc-maçauuu et éévêêêêk ! C'est terriiiip !
Here's a relatively unknown sketch featured in episode 41 of Monty Python's Flying Circus (or 2nd episode of the fourth series), "Toupée Department". Note that you won't see John Cleese because he had left the show at the end of the third series.
This illustrates the point that toupées should be banished because they're so absurd: they deceive nobody because you can immediately spot those "appendices" when a guy wears one! (Same thing for combovers…)
As a hors-d'œuvre before today's presentation on John Cleese that I'll be doing with Martin/Waldorf, let's watch this sketch where John tries to find a replacement, a "Cleese Idol" so that his comedic legacy may live on… This pseudo-contest was part of a Just For Laugh show in Montreal.
I also found a kind of commercial to promote the BBC:
Once again, let's watch something particularily silly: the voice of Chris Crocker's "Leave Britney Alone" message over shoots from Spongebob Squarepants (which is, incidentally, one of my favourite contemporary cartoons, believe it or not).
I love Patrick Star as Britney and Spongebob's facial expressions! (Especially when he cries…)
Today the Fortis newsletter featured pictures making a comparison between the package and what you really find in it. Let's first watch a video, and then take a look at the pictures:
While wandering on YouTube I came across new alternate endings and I wanted to show you some of them. Let's first watch the proof that Count Dooku has become more powerful than any Jedi:
What if Yoda was stronger than Palpatine, after all?
It's a shame that the guy who made it didn't manage to get rid of the digits, but it's a good idea, I think.
EditingRoom came up with a new idea, too: what if Vader decided to kill Luke after telling him the truth?
Predicting the future is a common term among time fans eagerly awaiting its release. The term refers to any leaked information about the future, and assumptions created from that information, as well as pure conjecture. This consists mostly of fans making guesses based on the mistakes of the past, which was widely regarded as only fun for the hardcore time fans. There are many internet discussion forums where the world's greatest minds come together and argue with one another whether the Future will stick to its simple roots, or be a complete sell-out that is all about the graphics.
What makes predicting the future difficult is that it is protected by the CSS encryption algorithm. Anyone who has tried to predict it prior to the 18th century has died; this is not known for certain.
A short selection of things that will happen in the future, according to Uncyclopedia:
Meanwhile, he played the role he is most known for: Basil Fawlty, the sharp-tongued, grumpy owner of a seaside hotel in the series called Fawlty Towers. He co-starred with Prunella Scales (as Basil’s wife, Sybil), Connie Booth (as the maid Polly) and Andrew Sachs (as the clumsy waiter Manuel). The series aired in 1975 and 1979, with only twelve episodes made in order not to compromise the quality of the show, but the episodes were so hilarious that they have had a lasting success up to now.
Due to a "delightful" PowerPoint presentation on the linguistic landscape of Eupen and Malmedy that we have to make by Thursday, I totally run out of time, so I fear I can just show you this brilliant episode that concluded the first series of Fawlty Towers with John Cleese:
— I was born on 12 February 1988 in Rocourt (in the municipality of Liège). I grew up in Aubel, then I studied in Herve (Collège Royal Marie-Thérèse). I took a bachelor's degree in Germanic languages (Dutch and English) in Namur, then I went to the KU Leuven to do a MA in Linguistics and Literature (Dutch and English). My main research interests are the translation of humour, intertextual references and multilingualism/heterolingualism.
// — I'm an Internet freak and fond of cinema.
// — I enjoy making (silly) comments on anything, grumpily bickering and nitpicking just like Statler from the Muppets.
// Why did you google my name, you nosy person?
"Tu veux ma photo, banane ?" (Biff Tannen, Back to the Future)
This picture was taken on 21 June 2007 while we were resting in front of a café in Damme. That day, just after the last exam of the first year, we had the opportunity to make a small excursion on a bike from Brugge to Damme.
My nicknames
Statler (coined by Prof. Lieven Vandelanotte) because I often make silly comments and crack jokes that nobody understands except my fellow Martin aka Waldorf
Statistics: number of visitors (starting on 5 November 2007)
Famous people I saw or met at least once (of course, nearly all of them come from Belgium)
Amélie Nothomb
André Flahaut
Anne-Marie Lizin
Arno
Axel Merckx
Benoît Poelvoorde
Bernard Hinault
Bla-Bla (I admit I was a great fan of his shows…)
Bouli Lanners
Bruno Coppens
Christophe Brandt
Christopher Lloyd
Didier Reynders
Didier Van Cauwelaert
Dupa (Jean Dupanloup)
Eddy Merckx
Eric De Staerke
Fadilah Laanan
Frédéric Deborsu
Frédéric Jannin
Gilles Dal
Grand Duke
Gryzette
Guy Verhofstadt
Herman De Croo
Howard Shore
Isabelle Durant
Jacques Balutin
Jacques Mercier
Jean Piat
Jean-Claude Vancauwenberghe
Jean-Jacques Jespers
Jean-Luc Fonck
Jean-Marie Leblanc
Joëlle Milquet
Juan d'Oultremont
King Albert II
Kris Peeters
Lance Armstrong
Laurence Bibot
Les Gauff' (Au Suc')
Lorent Deutsch
Marc Moulin
Marie Arena
Miam Monster Miam
Nathalie Uffner
Nicolas Sarkozy
No that's a joke, I never saw him
Olivier Monsens
Paolo Bettini
Philippe Geluck
Philippe Lafontaine
Philippe Lambillon
Pierre Aucaigne
Pierre Kroll
Pierre Rapsat
Pino Cerami
Prince Laurent
Prince Philippe
Queen Fabiola
Queen Paola
Raoul Reyers (Philippe Gouders)
Rik Verbrugghe
Robbie McEwen
Robert Sabatier
Robert Wasseige
Rudy Demotte
Saint André (the singer!)
Sam Touzani
Sergio Honorez
Stefan Liberski
Thomas Gunzig
Tom Boonen
Virginie Hocq
Virginie Svensson
People I dislike or hate or that irritate me (a selection)
Benedict XVI (Religious Extremist)
Benoît Dreze (CDH) (He wants to promote the so-called "chèques-service" which encourage slavery — namely people doing the housework you should do on your own)
Condoleeza Rice (A Shame For Women)
Donald Rumsfeld (Republican Idiot)
Filip De Winter (VB)
George W. Bush (Supreme Moron)
H.M. Leopold III (traitor)
John-Paul II (fortunately he died)
José Happart (PS) (Complete nerd)
Justine Henin (Tennis Player)
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (Extremist)
Mgr Léonard (Intolerant, Religious Extremist, Mentally Deranged, Pillock)
Michael Schumacher (Dikke Nek)
Paul Wolfovitz (yeah, that guy who can't buy a new pair of socks but can help his girlfriend get a better job…)
