"This is the most wretched hive of scum and villainy" (Obi-Wan Kenobi, Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope)

Lego Batman and Robin are up to kick some ass, so a lot of villains gathered for an epic struggle in Gotham City:



"Heath Ledger's Joker, Jack Nicholson's Joker, Mr. Freeze, Irina Spalko, Evil Monkey, Darth Vader, Penguin, SpongeBob Squarepants, Bane, the Riddler, my ex-girlfriend, Stewie Griffin, Patrick Star, Skeleton, Kit Fisto… Wait, wait: he's not a villain; he's a jerk… He died, he died of the Emperor. Two-Face, Mr. Krabs, Guy on the Skateboard and Dr Octopus."

100 movie spoilers in 5 minutes

The title says it all.

Alternate movie posters

What happens if someone reads a movie title incorrectly as an anagram? The whole cover changes, too!

50 impersonations in 50 seconds

Only thatguywiththeglasses could be crazy enough to do that:



Keaton: "I'm Batman"
Clooney: "I'm Batman"
Maguire: "I'm Spiderman"
Bloom: "I'm boring"

T: "Foo!"

You: "SHUT UP!"


Brilliant.

Lookalikes (3)

Our lookalikes tour continues! Let's start with some stars bearing an uncanny resemblance with dictators:


Brilliant.






Yet another (quasi) dictator…


Scary!


Take that, ugly old fascist!




Actually, it was (our "extremely diplomatic" minister) Karel De Gucht who suggested that first…


Perfect!


"Wicked!" (as Ron said in Harry Potter)


Always posing for the photographs…


ROFLOL


Wall-E really plagiarised our beloved Johnny Five!


Bravo!


Now I truly realise why I found Alf so weird: he had a combover just like Donald Trump!


Obvious.

A very topical lookalike indeed.

Haha!

And because I'm never tired of telling you that pope Darth Ratzi is evil:

The Pope is the monarch of the kingdom of Vatican (which is essentially his palace and his backyard) and over the minds of his horde of catholic followers, who are gullible enough to put a old senile pensioner on the throne.

Becoming pope

In 1939, Ben was in the Nazi German SS. And so, one day, while walking through the Warsaw, suddenly a filthy Polish beggar grabbed his leg begging for some money. Benny naturally pulled out his Walther to do some point-blank target practice, but suddenly heard a voice from the sky: "Don't kill this beggar!” Ignoring the voice, he aimed again, but the voice repeated: "Don't kill this beggar!" Annoyed, he aimed again and this time the voice said: "Don't kill this beggar - he will be a Pope one day". This time Benny did some thinking and finally returned the pistol to the belt grumbling - "OK, but only if I am to be the pope after him.”

Lookalikes

Today I received a Minezine newsletter about some of the most striking lookalikes that can be found on totallylookslike.com:






Haha!


Wicked!










Freaky!


Erick Avary is also Hamid Karzai's lookalike, as I already mentioned, remember!




Obvious.


How haven't I ever noticed that?


Funny.

Gotcha!


Brilliant!


I'm always amazed that there are people who think exactly the same, however weird your thoughts are…

When a Joker meets another…

What if the Joker faces the Joker? I mean, Jack Nicholson (Batman, 1989) v Heath Ledger (The Dark Knight, 2008)? Let's watch the trailer:



"This town needs an enema!"

Jack Nicholson himself talks about playing the Joker:



The 1989 Joker had some very good lines, like these:

"What do you want?"
"My face on the one-dollar bill."
"You must be joking."
"Do I look like I'm joking?"

Batman returns (I mean he's back)

Remember the first Batman: The Dark Knight trailer?



A very gifted film editor on YouTube came up with this re-cut trailer: shots from Tim Burton's 1989 Batman with the audio from The Dark Knight.



Wasn't that brilliant? According to me, the best bits is "Why so serious?" and "I like that": Jack Nicholson's facial expression is perfectly tuned with the audio.

The second trailer has eventually been released, so enjoy it!



The Joker (Heath Ledger) kicks ass! (but not for the Lord…) There's also a hint about district attorney Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart) becoming Two-Face… Did you spot that as well?

Jack Nicholson approves this blog entry

This blog entry is dedicated to Ellen, because I know she's a supporter of Hillary Clinton.

Several days ago, Jack Nicholson officially gave his support to Hillary during a TV commercial for her presidential campaign.



It uses fragments of scenes taken from Batman, The Shining, A Few Good Men and Chinatown.

My favourite YouTuber, thatguywiththeglasses, came up with a witty parody of this ad:

"Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?"

This quote comes from Tim Burton's 1989 Batman:



This version, which I find extremelly good, opposed Michael Keaton to Jack Nicholson as the Joker. This year, though, a new version of the struggle between Batman and the Joker is to be released, namely The Dark Knight, the sequel to Batman Begins, with Christian Bale as Bruce Wayne and Heath Ledger as the Joker. Also returning: Michael Caine as Alfred, Morgan Freeman as Lucius Fox and Gary Oldman as Commissioner Gordon. Here's the most awaited trailer:



That will be the last film Heath Ledger stars in, for he died on 22 January. That's a shame, because he was a very talented actor, as we all saw his performance in Brokeback Mountain, that film that gave rise to so many parodies.



Today's Uncyclopedia featured article: WTC.

Happy Gilmore: we want more!

Yesterday I gave you a small teaser about Happy Gimore, with Adam Sandler at the beginning of his career, before he plays in Big Daddy, the more romantic Punch-Drunk Love, the brillian Mr. Deeds and Anger Management with Jack Nicholson. He's also a well-known comedian in the US, being a Saturday Night Live cast member.

Since I don't have much time to write (because one of our professors thought we had nothing to do, so we were given a "delightful" project on linguistic landscapes), here's the Wikipedia plot summary that I enhance with scenes kindly posted on YouTube by benevolent people:

Happy (Adam Sandler) is an aspiring ice hockey player who masters a powerful slapshot that his father taught him as a child. However, his aggression and poor skating ability render it impossible for him to make any hockey team. His grandmother (Frances Bay), with whom he's lived almost all his life due to an unfortunate hockey related incident which killed his father, has not paid taxes on her home for several years. As such, she owes $275,000 to the IRS and the house that Happy's grandfather "built with his bare hands" is about to be repossessed. Due to a series of events that lead Happy to believe in his own ability to use his powerful slapshot in the game of golf, he joins the PGA Tour in order to win enough money to buy back his grandmother's house from the government.

Aspiring PGA Tour winner Shooter McGavin (Christopher McDonald) sees Gilmore as a threat, and tries to thwart any attempt of his to steal his thunder. Although his golf game and his manners on the green aren't rounded- his driving is excellent but he has trouble when it comes to putting-, Happy is guided by one-handed golf coach Chubbs Peterson (Carl Weathers) and the tour PR head (Julie Bowen), who help him in finding his own way to win tournaments with a cooler head. Although his time on the course is jeopardised when he goaded into attacking Bob Barker,

Happy manages to make some extra money by signing an endorsement deal with Subway, thus earning the $275,000 he needs to buy back his grandmother's house. The movie itself is actually promoted at many Subway resturaunts.

Unfortunately, at the auction, he is outbid by Shooter McGavin, who offers Happy the house under the terms that he in exchange quits the tour. Happy is persuaded to continue with his new golf career by the notion that his grandmother would rather see him succeed than have the house. Shooter agrees to give Happy the house if he beats him in the tour championship.

With some help from Chubbs and some lessons at the nearby Crazy Goly course, Happy improves his putting skills, but Chubbs subsequently dies in an accident. Determined to win the game for Chubbs, Happy goes head-to-head with Shooter, and- despite Shooter's attempts at sabotage…

… such as having a deranged fan drive onto the course and topple a TV tower in front of the last hole- wins the championship, becoming a pro golfer and in turn getting his grandmother's house back.

Before she got her house back, Happy's grandmother went to an institution for elderly people run by Ben Stiller:

— Sir, could I trouble you for a glass of warm milk: it helps put me asleep.
— You can trouble me for a glass of—shut the hell up! Now you'll go to sleep, or I will put you into sleep.

I love Ben Stiller's moustache. Not that I'd like to have one, but I find it funny. And by the way, Frances Bay (the grandma) played in a couple of episodes of Seinfeld, being the lady who gets stolen her rye bread.

Later in the film, Stiller uses his authority to oblige his residents to work for him:

— My fingers hurt…
— What's tha'?
— My fingers hurt.
— Well… oooh. Now, your back's gonna hurt, because you've just pulled landscaping duty…

Uncyclopedia's featured article: James Bond

Number of chicks that Bond has laid since you started reading this article:

Number of chicks dying of Bond's STD since you started reading this article:

“I like them shaken, not stirred.”

— James Bond on Bond Girls

“I hope you're not just another Russian girl whose name is a cheap sexual pun, Ms. Sukmeov.”

— James Bond on Bond Girls

“Ingenious, Q. It's a bomb, but it's also a rucksack.”

— James Bond on the originality of MI6 (British equivalent of the CIA)

“My name is Bond, James Emilio Ricardo Hernandez Gonzales Emanuel Bond.”

— James Bond on his Spanish heritage

“You have AIDS Mr. Bond. You've had it since the early 80's. You also have every STD known to man. Honestly, it's a medical miracle that you are still alive.”

— James Bond's Doctor on Jame Bond's junk