Showing posts with label Crappy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Crappy. Show all posts

11/27/2008

"Howard the Duck" reviewed by the Nostalgia Critic!

"A long time ago a young filmmaker named George Lucas helped create a parallel dimension in a galaxy far, far away. It's a strange world, bizarre aliens and unbelievable creatures. A world that the sci-fi community will never, ever, forget. Okay the punchline is Howard the Duck… For all the strange things that George Lucas has done, whether it'd been [EDIT: "it be" instead] bad, unnecessary or… just downright racist, nothing compares to the weird cinematic bomb that he made the strange choice of producing Howard the Duck. And if you think Jar Jar Binks was bad… HE STILL IS."



"He sits around, drinking beer, smoking cigars and reading the latest edition of 'Playduck'. You know, A KIDS MOVIE!"

"There's no way IN HELL that I'm going to beat DUCK TITS WOO-HOO! I mean, what is the point? You are making a kids movie starring a cute little ducky and you start out with duck tits? Are you mad? What kind of creepy pervert thought that up?!?" I mean, this movie is rated PG, right? And this is considered PG material? Are you seriously telling me that showing female breasts is wrong but showing Daisy's knockers isn't gonna cause any psychological damage?!? I think that the people who rated this movie had psychological damage!

"The human world of the eighties!"

"I'm just gonna have this on stand-by, I hope you don't mind."



"Help! I'm getting my ass kicked by poultry!"

"The scientist continues to re-enact scenes from The Exorcist."

'I'm now one of the dark overlords of the universe…'

"And your mother sucks cocks in hell! Blalalallalaa!! On top of that he can also use his mental powers to do horrible insane things like assassinate table condiments!"

"The odd thing is that even after people leave he just keeps blowing shut up. I guess he just has a real hate for condiments and kitchen utensils."

"After the scientist changes into Albert Einstein's heroin-addict cousin…"

"Oh yeah, you will believe a duck can rock. I also believe that a duck can blow! This is the worst thing that George Lucas has made since… anything not… Star Wars or Indiana Jones related. AND EVEN THAT HE SLOWLY TRIED TO DESTROY!"

7/31/2008

Male driving

The other day I posted a video showing a woman having some trouble getting into a parking lot which she didn't seem to find too small. I also wondered if it wasn't a coincidence that the driver was a woman. There's a common belief that women can't drive, and that's sometimes fair to say that. Fortunately, such things as the parking disaster aren't common place. Besides, men can be terrible at driving as well. Here's a video on the origins of the phenomenon:



A silly commercial:



A picture slideshow featuring some car wrecks, most of which are to be attributed to male drivers in my opinion:



1:26 --> Welcome to Kazakhstan!

Rally drivers (all men, of course: women are clever enough not to take part in these races) are known to be dumb, stupid, daft, idiotic jackasses. In the following video, none of them manages to get past a corner successfully:



Note that gradually more people came to witness the accidents!

Soldiers driving a Hummer in Iraq:



"We brake for nobody"

7/18/2008

NostalgiaCritic analyses… "Batman & Robin"!

Here's the trailer of the most awaited critic/critique of one of the worst movies (or "pile of shit", I should write) that has ever been created. I even watched this "thing" this very afternoon, just to have a good laugh and then after I re-watched the brilliant review made by thatguywiththeglasses.



Perhaps you are willing to watch the movie trailer — but don't do it if you don't want to waste 2,5 minutes of your life.



Now, if you're ready, please watch this amazing review (sorry but there's no imbedding on his website):

http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/nostalgia-critic/34-nostalgia-critic/234-batman-and-robin

5/14/2008

"I need to go to the toilet!" (Andy Pipkin, Little Britain)

Going to the toilet isn't a nightmare anymore for women who are afraid of germs on the seat:



It was unavoidable that I show you, after the world's cleanest toilet, the world's most disgusting "toilet":



"Ants, beetles, mosquitos, fleas, spiders… Oh! Several congrate! (…) A toad! (…) And we've got toilet paper!" / "That's a shit box!"

Yet, there's hope: the Viper, the state of the art in the domain of flushing huge piles of [INSERT WORD HERE]:



For those of you who think they waste a lot of clean water when flushing, the following video will prove that you're wrong: it is possible to waste more. Check this out

A comment on YouTube:

"That's not a toilet that's a washing machine" --> So true!



Today's Uncyclopedia featured article: the toilet (and the Pee Review, as a bonus)

This blog entry's title refers to the following sketch from Little Britain:



There's another one involving the bathroom:

3/10/2008

"I'm a very good driver"

Jeremy Clarkson doesn't like crappy cars:



Consider the worst cars you've considered to buy: [Volvo, Yugo, Mazda, Lada, Hunday]

(…) made with the care of a third-world plumbing system and it was more aerodynamic going backwards. This was the worst model of them all: the Vanden Plas.

That one takes the biscuit!

PS. Ignorants should note that the title is a quote from Rain Man, starring Dustin Hoffman and Tom Cruise. Here's the brilliant five second version of the movie, made – of course – by thatguywiththeglasses:



SHUT UP!

1/21/2008

Mac vs. PC

"Spécial dédicace" for Pitchou: he asked me to explain the differences between a Mac and a (Windows) PC. I think that these short advertisements deliver a clear message:



True that you always have to buy extra expensive items to enhance your PC — and I'm not even talking about upgrades…




Security problems are really annoying. Especially when you're subject to viruses:



Gesundheit! 114.000 viruses attacking PCs, none for Macs!




Did you catch the difference?




True that PCs crash pretty often, while Mac rarely do. (It happened only thrice with my iBook G4 in three years, and it was just my fault, not the computer's.) I find it pretty awkward that you've got to click on "Start" in order to turn off your computer… That's pretty dumb!

And as a special treat to my old Muppet friend Martin aka Waldorf, I found an old commercial that's a reference to George Orwell's 1984:




Even Bill Gates says Macs rule:



To create a new standard, it takes something that's not just a little bit different, it takes something that's really new and really captures people's imagination and the Macintosh, of all the machines I've ever seen, is the only one that meets that standard. (1984)
Thumbs up!!

It is quite a shame for PCs to have SEVERAL pages on Wikipedia about criticism of Microsoft (the whole company, I mean), while there are no such things for Macs… Well, you can only find this:
Apple has received criticism for not notifying users of system vulnerabilities until a fix is released,[85] and has been accused of pressuring journalists to release their sources, with regards to leaked information about new Apple products.[86] Apple also has received criticism for its iPhone and iPod integration with iTunes for not facilitating creation of software to run and maintain those devices using different applications tools besides iTunes.[Source] Apple also has been investigated and criticized for possible sweatshop conditions in factories in China where contract manufacturers make its iPod.[Source] Apple also has received criticism and two class-action lawsuits at both state and federal level about its iPhone product only allowed service through AT&T and the recent software update that made the iPhone useless if it was to be unlocked using a different tool that cited monopolistic and antitrust allegations between the two companies.[89]
Basically, these are just legal issues. They are indeed to be condemned, but as far as the computers are concerned, it doesn't matter a lot. Quite the contrary, here are the links to criticism on Microsoft products:


To finish with, why wouldn't you read this Uncyclopedia entry on Scientology. Some quotes to give you an idea:

Whoa... I must have been so high.L. Ron Hubbard

I'd say it's horse shit, but I've never seen a horse's ass that big.Oscar Wilde on Space Opera in Scientology

Scientology is the stupidest thing i've ever heard of .99.99999999999% of the population of the universe on scientology

ROFLGod

LMAOBuddha

I once did scientology, but they never called me back.Oscar Wilde

1/11/2008

"Are you having a laugh?"

(The title quotes the character of Andy Millman, a crappy comedian played by Ricky Gervais in his series, Extras. In the second season, Millman managed to have his own s(h)itcom, namely When the Whistle Blows. His character has not only a wig, but also a catchphrase: "Are you having a laugh? Is he having a laugh?")

I had the idea of googling "Lada jokes" on Google, and here are some great jokes I found on a website about these crappy cars of which Jeremy Clarkson made fun in an episode of Top Gear, remember.



You don't need to read all of them (obviously: one should not have too much of a good thing…).
Q: Which is the biggest society of belivers?.
A: The Lada owners, they all belive they have a car!

Q: What's the difference between a Lada and a Jehovah's Witness?
A: You can close the door on a Jehovah's Witness.

Did you hear about the bloke who had his Lada broken into?
The thieves put him a radio in!

Q: What do you call a Lada going up a hill?
A: A bloody miracle.

Somewhere in the middle of Spain, a Lada is driving along and meets a donkey.
The donkey, never having seen a Lada before, asks: "What are you?"
The Lada says "I am a car. What are you?"
The donkey says "Hahahaha... If you're a car, I'm a horse!"

Heard of Lada's new turbo model?
It has pedals in the backseat, too!

Q: How do you make a Lada worth twice as much?
A: You fill up the gas tank.

Q: Why is the Lada's rear window heated?
A: So the hands of the people pushing it will not freeze.

Q: How do you make a Lada disappear?
A: You spray it with rust remover!

A Lada can reach a speed of 125 mph… if it's transported on the railway!

Did you know that the Lada's instruction book contains 500 pages?
There are two pages with information about the car and 498 pages with bus and train timetables.

Q: Why do insurance companies enjoy Lada's?
A: They are never stolen.

Q: Why is there light under the Lada's bonnet?
A: So you can fix it 24 hours a day.

Q: There is a new 16 valve Lada.
A: It has 8 in the engine, and 8 in the radio.

My cousin was unemployed. Then he became a Lada salesman.
He is still unemployed, but now we understand why

Q: Do you know what all the Lada owners are dreaming about?
A: Getting a ticket for speeding.

From a newspaper: To the man who stole my Lada in 20 degrees of frost.
Keep the Lada, but please tell me how you started it!

Did you know that there are only two men working in the Lada factory?
One with scissors and one with glue.

Q: Do you know what the trip counter in the Lada says when it's passing 20,000 miles?
A: Game Over!

Q: What's the difference between a Lada and a golf ball?
A: You can drive a golf ball 200 metres.

--> Brilliant, but impossible to translate that into French!

Q: What do you call a Lada that starts first time?
A: A novelty.

Q: What do you call a Lada that overtakes you?
A: A mirage.

Q: What to you call a Lada with brakes?
A: Customised.
A couple of French jokes:
Q : Pourquoi deux conducteurs de Lada se reconnaissent immédiatement lorsqu'ils se rencontrent ?
R : Ils se sont vus le matin au garage.

Q : Combien peux-tu mettre de personnes dans une Lada ??
R : Tout dépend de la taille de la dépanneuse.

1/05/2008

Mac or PC?

Most of you know the answer to that question. Here's an awesome rap about it:



I'm a right-clicka
I'm an iBook flippa
Macs and PCs - no fight gets bigga
Surf Safari or browse in I.E.
Better know what you rep(resent) - a Mac or PC!

USB 1-2.0, son, you don't know
watch my data flow
From MS-DOS command line prompts
Black backgrounds, no special sauce
Well I've only been around since '84
But my ease of use has done so much more
From a Plus to a Classic to a II GS
To a PowerPC, my OS is the best
So clickable, design is lickable
My aqua interface makes XP dispicable
Quick I pull the RAM stick out the slot
Then I swap it with generic
cause the port is hot

If you see life through an LCD
Betta know your brand is it a Mac-or-PC?

Take a look at Vista
enjoy the view
I suggest Premium or the ultimate skew
cop a Dell with a graphics card - super fast
turn the arrow on and lick the glass
Tiger's fast as hell
But Leopard's got the boom
Time machine is mad mean
You're absurd - what's a zune?
Middle name: innovate
All features integrate
Now stay the hell out of my developers' conferences!
Nonsenses - I'm networking
You're not working
Stop staring at your built-in webcam
YouTube surfing
Ha! 1,000 views is pretty fresh
ComputerGal36 even says I'm the best

He is the best with his videos
And cuts them all on his Final Cut Pro

Mac, PC, and Me, At Last

When I run IT'S A iPOD!
Talk IT'S AN iPHONE!
Stuff I gotta have no matter what
It's an iLOAN!
I want an Intel, plus CS3,
but for now I'm streamin keynotes in bed
Listenin to Steve
Uh! Compatibility
Everybody fits with me
All the applications wanna get with my virility
At any time
Yo, it might go off
And you can ride it
Til it's Micro-Soft
Huh! Pay attention
I got a new invention
Steal your next idea
At the MacWorld Convention

But guess what
You'll always be behind
Cuz Mac is a state of mind
Everything they say is sooo true!

MAC RULES!!!

7/29/2007

"God Bless The Driver"

Watch this and you'll understand the title…

3/30/2007

Last Day Of Penitence

And so we continued our journey through the marshes, swamps, will-o'the-whisps and other troublesome natural features… No, it wasn't as bad as I describe it. I've already told you about the Tuesday evening and the Wednesday. Unfortunately, I didn't take any photograph on that Thursday, and I can't precisely remember what we did… I know that we walked a lot, under the rain (fortunately, our sleeping bags were now useless), from Nivezé to Banneux, where we were rather well accomodated by sisters and we got single rooms (!!!) with a shower, a toilet, a tap (with hot water) and a desk, etc.!!! (The picture sums it up.)

One of the sisters (coming from Africa) was a really kind woman, but I though she was under the influence of crack or coke or something else, because she was like talking about Jesus all the time and about miracles in Banneux — a sanctuary place established by Léon Degrelle, grim character (how euphemistic), in 1933, at a time when the fascistic Rex Party was popular (what a surprise!). It's all right to talk about Jesus (especially if you're a sister), but maybe not that much!

We left round 10 o'clock, after breakfast and a cheap montage about the creation of Banneux, and the story of the so-called apparitions to Mariette Beco — who's by the way now an old lady who can't talk to the media. We walked towards the next village of Tancrémont, where you can, as they said, find the best pies around. (When I was a kid, we used to go there to eat something with my grand-parents. I didn't like the pies that much: I prefered playing in the huge sandbox.) On the picture, you can see that I walk really faster than the others… They were 100 metres away…

Later on, we had to cross a river, and the only way to succeed was to use a rusted bridge… What a kerfuffle! I thought somebody was going to fall in the water, but no.

Later in the day, after another 10 kilometres in the woods and using crappy, muddy paths, we arrived at the border of our destination: Verviers, as you can see on the picture, we were cheerful to see that board!

OK, we still had 5 kilometres to walk, and we did. I had enough energy left, and I arrive 10 minutes sooner than the others… I had achieved my goal: seeing that beautiful chip-shop in front of the Railway Station! When my mother came to pick me up, I ate a lot of chips with a "cervelas" (imagine a saussage with unidentified stuff in it). I was exhausted. I came back, I had a shower and I slept.

3/27/2007

After A Terrible Night, A Horrific (Penitent's) Walk

After having slept for two hours, we had to get up at 7 o'clock. At last, I was going to warm up… And annihilate that f*****g metalic tap! The others seemed to have slept rather well, actually. I wanted to get out of this crappy place. But before doing anything else, we had to clean that big room up… What a kerfuffle! We first packed our bags and stuffs, then we took a broom and brushed the thick layer of dust on the ground (a wooden one…) while girls were trying to have a wash with the frozen water.
(Now, I wonder how they managed to pee with such frozen toilets… We, boys, don't have this problem. Except for the fact that when we get outside to pee, our privates are frozen, too…)
The point is that the so-called "hotel" was cleaner than at the time we first entered it… The owners should be hanged publicly! It's a shame to let people sleep there—and make them pay for it! We had breakfast and we prepared sandwiches to eat on our way.

That day's goal was to reach the town of Spa, which lies round 20 kilometres further, by walking through the Fagnes, a protected natural area. On the day before, it had snowed. On the day in question, it rained…

We left that alleged "hotel" (without any bit of nostalgy) and we walked towards Stavelot, then penetrated the depths of the Fagnes. It looked as if it was only a big hill… And the snow conjugated with rain made matters worse… We were exhausted. Soaked socks. Hungry, starving… Fortunately, I had brought sugar along. I was thirsty. My bottle of water being soon empty, I had to eat snow to refresh myself… It was a white hell. I wanted to commit suicide.

We walked for five hours in the wet snow, passing through dark woods and climbing steep pathways. We were completely exhausted. I only had a bit of a chocolate to get some energy… we climbed, we climbed, we climbed…

At 2 o'clock, we finally arrived at M. Delrée's sister's house. We devoured our sandwiches rapidly (this was the best chocolate sandwich I've ever had), while M. Delrée and Schyns were trying to light a fire to heat us up. Stinky, we got back on the roads to continue that hellish walk.

After another 10 kilometres, we walked in the snow-covered Fagnes, where the wind blew terribly. M. Delrée told us there was a coffie shop two kilometres away, so I decided to go as a scout. I was completely annihilated when I found out that this coffie shop was not open—even if a ironic board stated that it was opened! No Cécémel. I would have to wait a little bit more.

We continued and finally arrived to our destination (of the day): a kind of hotel held by sisters in Nivezée, on the highs of Spa. There, we were absolutely thrilled that we had rooms (!) for 3 (!) with three radiators (!) with hot water (!) and a bath (!) and plenty of food was waiting for us. In the evening, our two teachers prepared a barbecue for us, as you can see on the picture. I think I ate 2 kilos of meat—no kidding. And I was still starved.

Later, a man came and talked to us about fairtrade and we took part in a role play, where I had to play a soldier being corrupted by banks and honey producers, while being faithful to a Big Boss, whose role was played by M. Delrée, who was really suitable in this role of dictator…

We went to bed and we slept tight. At last.

3/26/2007

The Worst Sleeping Place Ever

For sure, back in that time, I had never spent such a horrible night! It was afwul, terrible, exhausting!

Let's give a bit of context. We were a group of about 20 students going on a kind of four-day trip which we called a "retraite" (my dictionary doesn't seem to have a translation for that term), supposed to be a so-called retirement journey to I-don't-know-what. Two teachers were with us, namely M. Schyns (Biology teacher) and M. Delrée (Geography teacher, the funniest teacher I've ever had, a genius).

Our trip started in Herve (town where my college lies) and we took the bus to Verviers, then to a remote place called Wavreumont, not far away from Stavelot, in the Belgian Ardennes. Instead of staying at a hotel kept by monks, we had to stay in a wooden cabin—it was actually that—that the owners dared to call a hotel… Inside this crappy place, where mushrooms and moss and other disgusting organisms were copulating and feeding each other (you got the picture, I think), humidity was at its highest (it nearly rained), and we had to warm this cabin with a fuel radiator (see the picture, on which you can see that thing warming up the taps which were nearly frozen). I suddenly remembered that M. Delrée told us two weeks before we go, concerning Wavreumont: "Si vous comptez prendre une douche… n'y comptez pas.". I got his point.
It was soooo cold, sooo chilly that the toilets were frozen!!! I had never seen that before, and I haven't seen that ever since.

In fact, we had to heat up water on a hob in order to cook pastas, and save a little to have a wash. The dinner was terrible, because we had to eat in plates that were wet (due to humidity) and it tasted really bad. Later in the evening, a monk came to talk about his life as an authentic monk. He looked rather depressed and our question about being single in the middle of a group of old bachelors seemed to make his distress bigger.

After a couple of games or I don't know what, it was time to go to bed. In sleeping bags: the blankets seemed so dusty and moth-eaten that it was safer not to use them. We had to shut down the fuel radiator: it was too noisy, and we could have been poisoned by the toxic gas which filled the one room where boys and girls had to sleep, along with the teachers.
That night was the worst one of my entire life. Ever. I couldn't sleep. Why? For many reasons:
- Once the radiator shut down, the temperature dropped 20 degrees (at least).
- I tried to cover my face as much as possible, but it was pure stifle after 2 minutes.
- My nose was frozen.
- The others had managed to doze off, and it disturbed me that they weren't disturbed.
- The tap in the "bathroom" hadn't been properly tapped, so that a drop was falling every second. I was becoming mad, insane, crazy!!! I wanted to commit suicide, escape from this frozen hell!!!

Anyhow, I have sleep. But only for two hours, I think. The next day, 25 km of walk were waiting for us…


PS. I found something in my archives… Previously, I gave you my account on the "retraite" — you know, that painful walk though the Ardennes. I found the paper that M. Delrée gave us during an information session about the trip. Here's what you could read on it. Square brackets refer to notes that I wrote on the text, basically the funny comments by M. Delrée.
Retraite itinérante (mardi 07/03 au vendredi 10/03/06)

Cher(e) …………………………………….,
Il est grand temps de te communiquer les dernières indications concernant ces trois jours.

Départ
Nous quitterons Herve, tous ensemble, le mardi 7, avec le bus 38B. Rendez-vous à l’arrêt de bus devant l’IPH, à 16 H 00. A Verviers nous prendrons le bus 395 jusqu’en bas de la côte de Wavreumont. Nous serons au gîte du monastère peu avant le souper.

Programme
• mardi soir : souper, rencontre avec un moine. [1]
• mercredi : messe à 8 H 00 suivie du petit déjeuner, remise en ordre des lieux, puis parche vers le Foyer de Charité de Nivezé (+/- 25 km). [2] Installation, puis barbecue [3] et animation sur le “”commerce équitable” par une personne de l’association“ Miel Maya”.
• jeudi : petit déjeuner, remise en ordre des lieux, puis marche vers Banneux (+/- 20 km). Arrivée au Foyer Notre Dame de la Fagne, souper et animation avec les sœurs.
• vendredi : petit déjeuner, remise en ordre des lieux. Passage au sanctuaire de Banneux, puis marche vers Verviers (+/- 15 km). [4]


Retour
Nous serons à Verviers vers 15 H 00 ; les parents qui le souhaitent peuvent reprendre leur fils/leur fille à la gare, les autres reprennent le bus jusque Herve ; arrivée prévue vers 16 H 00.

L’accompagnement
Est assuré par Didier Schyns et Jacques Delrée.

A emporter
Un sac à dos confortable, un sac de couchage, de quoi se changer et se laver pendant trois jours, des chaussures ou des pantoufles pour l’intérieur, un petit nécessaire de pharmacie (prévoyez de quoi soigner les ampoules), de bonnes chaussures de marche (pas neuves si possible) et une gourde. Prévois la pluie, la boue, les températures fraîches…(à titre facultatif: un chansonnier, une lampe de poche, un instrument de musique, …). Prends aussi un peu d’argent de poche pour les trajets en bus (10 euros suffiront amplement). [5]

Ne pas emporter
Une radio, un baladeur (MP3 ou autre), des boissons alcoolisées ou toute autre chose susceptible d’être confisquée ou de “casser” l’esprit de cette retraite. L’utilisation des GSM sera interdite durant la marche et les autres activités de groupe Les fumeurs éventuels recevront des règles strictes à respecter.

Remarque importante
Mardi 7 au matin, tu déposeras, dans le frigo de la salle des profs (avec une étiquette “retraite itinérante”) un morceau de viande (emballé dans un sachet plastique) pour le barbecue de mercredi. Demande à un prof de lee placer dans le sac qui sera prévu à cet effet dans le frigo.

Pour que cette retraite soit un bon moment pour tous, nous comptons sur chacun d’entre-vous pour respecter les consignes, respecter les endroits qui nous accueillent (propreté, ordre, calme, …) et les personnes que nous rencontrerons.
Si tu as une question spécifique, n’hésite pas à nous contacter le plus rapuidement possible.


Jacques Delrée (087/661427) et Didier Schyns.

En cas d’urgence uniquement : J.Delrée 0494/171835, Wavreumont 080/862318, Nivezé 087/793090 et Notre Dame de la Fagne 04/3608408. [6]

——————————
NOTES:

[1] “Vous pourrez lui poser des questions, comme pourquoi est-ce qu’il n’aime pas les femmes…” (…) “On ne loge pas au monastère, mais au gîte.” (…) “Si vous comptez prendre une douche, n’y comptez pas”. Puis il a dit qu’il y aurait assez d’eau chaude seulement pour eux, les profs…
[2] “C’est l’étape la plus belle.”
[3] “(…) un barbecue avec un petit homme de Nivezé, un ex des Village People…”
[4] “(On passera par Tancrémont), vous connaissez les tartes de Tancrémont… très chères…”
[5] “(Pour payer quand on s’arrêtera, vous prendrez) un chocolat chaud, une bière pour nous…”
[6] (À un élève qui mâchait un chewing-gum) “Dis, vieille méduse malade, tu ne vas pas jeter ton chewing-gum par terre…?”
Phone numbers, names and places are authentic. Spelling mistakes too (e.g. "rapuidement" instead of "rapidement").

3/22/2007

Jeremy Clarkson's Best Of Destruction

Jeremy Clarkson is a holy man: he does to cars what we're longing to do!!!
Warning! Before watching this hell of a video, go to the toilet, otherwise you'll do in your pants.



Oh! It's already finished?! I want more of it! I have a thirst for car destruction now…

3/21/2007

Who Would Like To Crush A Lada?

A Lada is THE example (should I say: the epitomé?) of a crappy car. Check this out:


Another crappy car, which we can see by the way in Die Hard III, is the Yugo:


This Jeremy Clarkson is a genius, and also probably a maniac (like Benjamin).

PS. The other day, I was making fun of cats. Click on the link "Batman Returns" on the left of this blog (section Favourite Films) to see what happens to a cat if it gets to close to a penguin. Check out the sound (or screem) it shouts: universal, isn't it?

3/01/2007

A Rainy Day in Seraing

Four pics instead of one! I took them the day Guy Mathot, a maffia godfather and mayor of Seraing (a derelict, polluted, post-industrial area in the suburbs of Liège), was buried. It was rainy, lots of people in the streets were walking towards the church—strange, because as a socialist, he shouldn't have gone to a church… Anyway, this day (26 February 2005) was a red-letter day (again, for a socialist, all is well that ends well…) because it was the end of the egemony of Guy Mathot. But guess what? he was succeeded by his son, Alain Mathot, who since then has been elected as mayor of Seraing. Result: the Godfather's aura is still there.
On the pictures (that I took from the back of my car), you can see a steel factory, a animal-food shop, the logo of a supermarket and Seraing's main mall (it's crappy, I know), and I haven't shown you the worse of Seraing!

2/28/2007

Middelkerke's Casino

This is a view of the Casino of Middelkerke, probably the only one that is on a (relatively) small promontory on the beach, with a special shape, and that can be seen from Oostende and Nieuwpoort (which gives a radius of more than 10 kilometres). There are parking lots on the right. In front of the casino, there's a large place for go-carts and bikes and rollers. There's also a tramway stop so that the old people (that seem to nest into these vehicles) can get off.


Usually, you see big cars such as Mercedes, BMWs, Jaguars, etc. But when I saw this Lada—an unexpensive Russian car—, I knew it would make a perfect addition to my collection of pictures. I don't think its owner was in the casino at that moment…

2/27/2007

An Old Car Seen in Herstal (Liège suburbs)

When I saw this car, I knew I had to take a picture of it. Maybe this car can still ride… The mirror is about to fall, as is the (pot d'échappement) and other parts of the car, for that matter. The owner must be what we call in Walloon "barakî", which is equivalent to the English "chav" and the Flemish "Johnny".