The best way to feel the essence of a movie is to watch a summary of it: either the 5 second version or the f*cking short version… Hey, guess what? I found both for Scarface!:

"Leon": alternate ending

Luc Besson's Léon (or The Professional) is crossed over with Swordfish.

Scarface in 5 seconds

The title says it all!



PS. This five-second movie wasn't made by thatguywiththeglasses; he decided to stop making them so that he doesn't stretch his concept too much, but gives the opportunity to others to make their own.

"Tuer !!!"

Just listen to the guy…



(This guy has got a combover!)

This interview was part of the documentary magazine Strip-tease originally aired on the RTBF. If I remember correctly the guy was telling how he escaped from conscription by pretenting he was nuts. But I doubt it, somehow…

"L'émission tire son nom du terme « strip-tease », également appelé « effeuillage », qui consiste à se déshabiller progressivement face à un public, en musique, évoquant ainsi l'attitude de sujets filmés, qui finissent par se dévoiler devant la caméra, laissant les spectateurs découvrir leur intimité. Des spectateurs scrupuleux se sont parfois plaints que certains épisodes tournaient les sujets en dérision à leur insu."

Tumbler

The Tumbler (aka the newest Batmobile) is shown in Top Gear:



Here you can see a Tumbler competing with a Formula One Toyota:



I have to say I prefer the Batmobile that you can see in Tim Burton's Batman movies. For more information about it, please do not miss this video.

Clarkson in Holland

Jeremy Clarkson went to the Netherlands, which happens to be the country where the speed cameras were invented.



"Are there any speed cameras left in Holland?"



Bonus: Clarkson does some gardening... with a gun.

The Watch

The "watch scene" is one of my favourite ones in Pulp Fiction: Captain Kroon's monologue played by Christopher Walken.



"He'd be damned if any slope's gonna put his greasy yellow hands on his son's birthright. So he hid it in one place he knew he can hide something: his ass."

--> Brilliant line!

Here's the French version of the same scene, with Walken dubbed by Bernard Lanneau, who is the "official French voice" of Kevin Costner and Dennis Quaid.

John Cleese strikes back

As a hors-d'œuvre before today's presentation on John Cleese that I'll be doing with Martin/Waldorf, let's watch this sketch where John tries to find a replacement, a "Cleese Idol" so that his comedic legacy may live on… This pseudo-contest was part of a Just For Laugh show in Montreal.



I also found a kind of commercial to promote the BBC:

Home Alone alternate endings!

What happens if we apply the alternate ending technique to Home Alone? Well, something like this:

"Where did he go?"
"Maybe he commited suicide…" --> I love Marvin!

Now, what if Kevin underestimated the power of a a toilet full of petrol?



This reminds me of the Ocean's Eleven alternate ending:

Pulp Fiction

Quentin Tarentino's Pulp Fiction is for many (including myself) a terrific cult movie. Usually, I like movies that feature a normal, chronological structure, but this one is an exception. Indeed, Tarentino's editing makes it possible to take an uncommon approach on a storyline (a "postmodern nonlinear" one, as I read on Wikipedia), but it works pretty well. Besides, most of the lines are great, and so are the actors: John Travolta, Samuel L. Jackson, Uma Thurman, Bruce Willis, Harvey Keitel, Tim Roth and Christopher Walken. For the plot, I refer you to the Wikipedia summary.

This movie contains a lot of famous scenes, like that of the hamburger (the first video) and Samuel L. Jackson's biblical pronouncement:





"Royale with cheese. You know what they call it that?"
"Er… because of the metric system?"

"Oh, I'm sorry… Did I break your concentration?"

Later in the film, we see a good reason not to use guns:



A fucking short version is available, if you like, and someone made an attempt to summarize the movie to 30 minutes and edit it in order to make it chronological. You tell me if it's better or not.

UHF

"Weird Al" Yankovic is not only a talented singer, but also an actor. He starred in UHF, a movie spoofing a lot of movies. Watch the introduction, a parody of the beginning of Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark:



Weird Al also makes fun of Rambo to the extreme:



I'm your worst nightmare.

I'd like to own the same fake chest suit he wears… Notice the typical two dice hanging in the cockpit of the copter…

Gandhi gets a special treat as well:

Nobody f*cks with Jeremy Clarkson

Today's blog post is dedicated to Waldorf (aka Martin), for he sent me a couple of videos, one of which is the destruction of a Corvette by John Goodman, a terrific scene coming from The Big Lebowski:



Apparently, this is the Corvette time of the year, because there's also a blog entry on such cars on germ@namur. In the comments, I suggested everyone who's interested in Corvettes to take a look on an Uncyclopedia article: How to Crash Your Father's New Corvette? Jeremy Clarkson, too, has something against Corvettes:




Waldorf particularily liked the character of Jesus Quintana, played by John Turturro:



"I'll take it away from you and stick it up your ass and pull the fucking trigger till it goes click!"
"Jesus!"
"You said it, man: nobody fucks with the Jesus!"

Deer Hunter

While I was doing my duty (i.e. taking my exams), my family had fun watching movies and series. They saw a film called The Deer Hunter, with Robert DeNiro and Christopher Walken — two actors I admire. My brother was so enthousiastic about it that he told me to watch an extract on YouTube: the Russian roulette scene.

Wikipedia summary:

The Deer Hunter (1978) is an Academy Award winning American film about a trio of Rusyn American steel worker friends and their infantry service in the Vietnam War. It is loosely inspired by the German novel Three Comrades (1937), by World War I army veteran Erich Maria Remarque, that follows the lives of a trio of World War I veterans in 1920s Weimar Germany. Like that novel, The Deer Hunter meditates and explores the moral and mental consequences of war violence and politically-manipulated patriotism upon the meaning of friendship, honor, and family in a tightly-knit community and deals with controversial issues such Drug Abuse, Suicide, Infidelity and Mental Illness.

I have to see the rest of the movie! My brother told me that there were other funny scenes, like the use of a flamethrower to get rid of enemies…

PS. Maybe you wonder why I wrote "funny" instead of "violent". That's maybe I find violent scenes funny… What kind of a freak am I???


Today's Uncyclopedia featured article: Ronald McDonald, seen as a dangerous criminal and sex addict, but also prime minister of Hell.

Ronald McDonald poses for the camera with his victim.

Here is Ronald's original look. He only had about 5 fans, so he changed his face for more fans...to eat. But will he change back? NAW!!!

"Loves My Gun!"

(This title is a quote from Michael Moore's Bowling for Columbine.)

Well, I think you guessed what this post is all about: guns. I don't like guns (and I would like them to be banned from the entire universe—because you know I'm one hell of an optimistic person) but this fragment I'm gonna show you is part of a show on inventions, and it's presented by my "hero", the famous Jeremy Clarkson. Let's listen to him:



Of course, it's even more funny when he uses guns to destroy cars, just like he did in many of his shows:



This is totally silly, but I like it. Perhaps because it's something that I wouldn't do in real life. And that's why I enjoy killing people while playing on the Playstation—or, let's say, when I played on the Playstation… I wish I had more free time.

A Shop With Displaying Fake Guns…

In Paris, you can find really amazing things, such as this shop, which was full of fake guns, what we call in French "pistolets à billes". You could find all sorts of guns in there, from the little and crappy Colt to the AK-47… Everything was fake, but this was amazing! I'm not for guns, but this kind of stuff just make me laugh because they exist: how did it come that someone, someday, just got the idea of making fake guns that shoot small plastic balls?