"All who gain power are afraid to lose it" — Chancellor Palpatine, Star Wars - Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
// Just a blog among many others //
"Et comme dirait Grucho Marx : 'Si vous n'aimez pas mes opinions, j'en ai d'autres !'" (Jean-Jacques Jespers)
// This is a blog that is updated on a daily basis (if I have time, though…) and on which I feature things that I find funny. Enjoy and don't hesitate to post comments as well!
I finally uploaded pictures I took in Utrecht. More of them will soon be published! ;-) Please also notice that I uploaded the following ones in a small format because it'd have taken me ages otherwise. Maybe I'll post them on a skyblog.
The first meetings for Erasmus students took place in the Educatorium, Leuvenlaan 4 in De Uithof (i.e. the place where most of the campus lies). There were various workshops, e.g. culture, sports, administration, ESN (Erasmus Students Network), etc.
Magali smiles but doesn't wave.
This is the Casa Confetti, a block of student flats.
A "fietspad"; admire how flat and perfect they are — there's a world of difference between those bike paths and the Belgian ones!
The Oudegracht, apparently the oldest canal in the city.
On the left you can see the city hall and the Dom (i.e. the cathedral) in the centre.
Same thing.
Magali on this… whatever you name it. We had a long ride on it to discover some of the city's most important places.
No comment.
A picture of the group of exchange students Magali and I were with during the orientation day organised by ESN. We were in front of the oldest administrative building of the University, just next to the Dom.
Magali's room when I was temporarily staying there. Admire my camp bed on the left.
My new room, but that you already know.
Some nice old Dutch locomotives in front of the Spoorwegmuseum.
I still have to visit that museum, but so far I haven't really had the time.
On Monday 22 September ESN organised a "night canoeing", so I decided to attend it with Magali. In the picture you can (perhaps) see some of the canoes that we dragged on a bank in order to have a drink at a café.
This time, Batman and Hulk want to determine whose movie franchise sucked most before brand new movies were made this summer:
"I got a re-boot after fans called Batman and Robin a disastrous embarrassment to comic book movies everywhere."
"What? That, your movie? How do you sleep at night?" "At least, no-one mistook me for Shrek!" "Just like no-one mistaked [sic] George Clooney for you!"
I wanted to show you this brilliant clip from Dumb and Dumber, definitely one of the best comedies ever made. It stars Jim Carrey as Lloyd Christmas and Jeff Daniels as Harry Dunne, both being two jerks who travel through the States to find a certain Mary Swanson and give her a suitcase that she accidentally forgot at the airport. The fact is that Lloyd fell in love with her, but Harry didn't know that and dated her… When Lloyd heard about it, he decided to take a revenge on him
3:47 --> The best evil laugh in the movie history!
I wonder why the bad guys still try to beat the shit out of him, while it's as impossible as counting to infinity. (Except that Chuck did count to infinity. Twice.)
I'm sure you're familiar with those special telephone numbers thanks to which you can find information about anything. If you can remember, about a dozen of years ago a so-called "Eurolijn" or "Euroligne" was created to answer the citizens' questions about the (then) new European currency. As you could imagine, people sometimes asked stupid questions, as can be seen in this Alles kan beter sketch with Rob Vanoudenhove:
"En die biljetten, hoe gaan die er eigenlijk uitzien?" "Drie meter op drie, in 't wit en in blauw, op Triplex-platen en die wegen 300 kilogram!"
A couple of days ago I was telling you about my housing problem in Utrecht, because I didn't have one and I was really sick and tired of the Dutch housing system. However, I did find a room! I can't believe it myself! (Well I do, but it's just a way of speaking… or "writing", rather.) Let me tell you how I found it.
On Thurday I went to the Educatorium on the Leuvenlaan, in De Uithof (where most of the Utrecht University lectures are given except for the Law and Humanities Faculties) because all the Erasmus and other exchange students could obtain information about activities related to culture, sports, etc. but also the so-called "inschrijving bij de gemeente" and many other things. We also listened to a girl from Canada who told us about her stay in Utrecht and we were introduced to the ESN (for Erasmus Student Network) of Utrecht. On a notice board I spotted a short message on a sheet of paper: "Kamer te huur in Bilthoven. Graag bellen op (…)" or something like that. I called the guy and made an appointment on Sunday at two o'clock.
So I went to Bilthoven and met with Mustafa, who's about 25 years old and decided to let two rooms of his appartment to share the rent. He showed me the room (2 meters by 4,5, roughly), the kitchen, the loo, the bathroom, the living room with television and a dining room with a big brand-new fridge — so I won't nuke it. Most important of all: everything was clean — just as if Mr. Clean was a friend of Mustafa. We chatted for half an hour and we got on very well with each other. I told him about my housing problems and told him I was really interested. He then replied that I could have the room directly! Surprised, I asked if there were other candidates and he retorted that he preferred the "first come, first served" system. So later in the day I told him I'd take the room.
On Monday afternoon Mustafa came to Zeist, at Magali's to help me with my luggage and my camp bed, and we drove to Bilthoven, and then he showed me where the train station, the shops etc. were located, and after that I unpacked my luggage.
Here are some pictures that I took in the apartment:
– My bed and the radiator
Same thing, but from the opposite side:
– The corridor:
– The entrance, with the kitchen on the left and the toilet on the right:
– The kitchen:
– The shower, curiously without glass walls to contain water (as is the case everywhere in the Netherlands):
– The living room:
– The dining room, with fridge:
– What I can see from the front window:
Mustafa told me he didn't have an internet connexion yet, but there are several WiFi networks in the building, so I decided to "take advantage of them" because as you know I can't live without the Web.
Today I'd like to tell you about my first day in Utrecht — enjoy! (because I don't)
Yesterday it was high time I left Belgium to go to the Netherlands, more particularily to the city of Utrecht, where I'm supposed to spend the next five months as part of the Erasmus programme. Unfortunately I still haven't found a room, so my good classmate Magali, who's also staying in Utrecht, kindly invited me to spend a couple of days at her room.
So I left my beloved country round 9.30 with my mother. It took us roughly two and a half hours to get there and find a parking lot in the city centre. Then we looked for the building where I was to have an appointment with a study advisor who wanted to assess my proficiency in Dutch. We met Magali by chance near the Dom (a huge cathedral). We walked to the local KFC (fastfood outlet) to regenerate ourselves and then we headed for the aforementioned office. The study advisor received us at the same time because she understood that we were from the same university. We talked about our past courses in Dutch and things like that. Thanks to her we are now allowed to take a course that had been deleted for exchange students, but a bit later we were sent a confirmation e-mail by the professor, linking to a personal page and then we realized we should perhaps have picked another course… (Go to this address to witness the full boredom of this course.)
After this appointment we went to Zeist, where Magali's room is located. With me I only had clothes etc. for about 20 days, my student files, my laptop and a green camp bed. (I'm really far from the comfort I had in Namur… *Sighs*) My mother took the car and went back to Belgium — I wish I was with her. Honestly. I. Did. Not. Want. To. Stay. In. Utrecht. My first choice to go on an Erasmus trip was Leuven because it's the best Belgian university, as far as I know, and I thought I'd be sent there thanks to my good marks. Apparently the professors were thinking they were doing me a favour by sending me to Utrecht — I'm now fully disappointed with them. Not having a place to live is awful. I feel empathy for bums.
I'd like to make an ultimatum: if I still don't have a room on 13 September, I'm going back to Belgium, no matter what the (financial, academic…) consequences could be. I really hate saying that, but I'm really sick and tired of this Dutch system to find a room: you have to send an e-mail (which isn't free of charge at all) to the owner, who will then contact you if and only if he/she likes your face and your profile. Unfortunately this was hardly the case for me, but I managed to get two positive reactions out of the 35 e-mails that I sent:
The first room available was located in Wijk bij Duurstede, at 25 km from Utrecht. Unfortunately the room was really a pigsty (e.g. one of the dogs peed on the floor and the owner considered this normal) and far too expensive for what it was, given all the sanitary issues…
The second room that I got to see was located in Overvecht, nearby a nice shopping mall. The room and the flatmates were great but… they turned me down and chose an Italian exchange student instead, probably because he could cook them Italian dishes or something — I admit not having fully understood what the owner told me on the phone.
Yes, the worst of this is that even if you're elected to come and see a room, you have to be aware that you're a candidate amongst several others — and the big drawback I have is that I'm not Dutch… At least, I guess so.
Back to my first day here.
In the evening Magali and I went to the Zeist city centre to have lunch (roasted turkey under a thick layer of a disgusting brownish spicy sauce) and then we walked a bit, before taking the bus. We then had an awful time finding the right bus stop to get out (because it was completely dark) and the building where we're staying.
Anyway… I'm really desperate, even if the social activities we've been talked about today are great, but I won't fully enjoy them as long as I don't have a room.
The following clip shows you one of the best (if not the funniest) scene from Francis Ford Coppola's The Godfather Part II, starring here Robert DeNiro as the young Vito Corleone, who was building his "empire" at that time in the storyline. Enjoy the Vito Corleone negotiation technique:
I'm pretty sure you've already been called by a telemarketer. My favourite way of answering the guy/girl is presented by the well-known comedian Jerry Seinfeld:
"I can't talk right now, why don't you give me your home number and I'll call you later?" "Erm… Well, I'm sorry, we're not allowed to do that…" "Oh, I guess you don't want people calling you at home." "No." "Well now you know how I feel."
Brilliant lines. Seinfeld came up with something else that's quite worth it, too:
Here's another way to piss off a telemarketer: just answer with one single word.
I forgot to show you this theme song based on Danny Elfman's soundtrack for Tim Burton'sBatman. Please watch the original opening credits first, and then the song.
What follows is the special blog entry that I wrote for germ@namur.
(Since there has not been much activity on this blog for a long, long time, I thought it was now high time to write a special blog entry on one of Britain’s cultural icons, Jeremy Clarkson. Unlike other blog entries, this one is more than 500 words long, but after all this is precisely a special blog entry.)
Jeremy Clarkson was born on 11 April 1960 in Doncaster, England. Thanks to good sales of Paddington Bears (stuffed toys) his parents were able to send him to Repton, a public school. As a turbulent teenager, Clarkson was expelled because of his disrespect for rules, noticeably for smoking and drinking. Later he first worked as a travelling salesman for his parent’s business, but soon decided to make a living by writing articles in local newspapers. Afterwards he created the Motoring Press Agency, which was specialised in conducting road tests.
In October 1988 Clarkson joined the TV motoring programme Top Gear, which he presented until February 2000 – this was the programme’s original format. After a brief interruption the show was relaunched from 2002 onwards, but some things were changed to enhance the programme and give it a more entertaining quality: it is now shot in a studio, and Clarkson is helped by co-presenters: Richard "Hamster" Hammond en James "Captain Slow" May. Another big change was that each week a guest is invited for a chat and for testing a reasonably-priced car on a special track. Their lap time is recorded and a kept on a board. Past hosts include Ellen MacArthur, Sir Michael Gambon, Patrick Stewart and Stephen Fry.
Top Gear is now the most-watched TV show on BBC Two and it is rebroadcast in dozens of countries. The programme's success is due notably to Clarkson’s rather criticising style, his cynical approach and his outspoken views about a wide range of controversial subjects (e.g.g. the London congestion charge). Jeremy Clarkson is (in)famous for his disregard for environment and for 'killing' numerous 'hateful cars', which means that he regularly destroys all sorts of low performance vehicles. For instance he shot on a Yugo 45 with a tank canon, he organised a crash test between a locomotive and a Renault Espace at a level crossing and he split a Lada 2105 in two:
Here is a compilation of the most impressive destruction clips by Clarkson:
For the record, only one car managed not to be 'killed' by Clarkson: the Toyota Hilux, dubbed 'the world's toughest vehicle'. (Watch parts 1, 2 and 3 of the programme to witness this motoring miracle.) The car is now kept as a museum artifact on a plinth in the Top Gear studio.
Each week, Clarkson and his ‘goons’ test vehicles ranging from the reasonably-priced (e.g. theVolkswagen Fox) cars to expensive supercars (e.g. the world's fastest and most expensive car, the Bugatti Veyron), as well as peculiar cars (e.g. the Peel P50, the world's smallest car – Clarkson, who is 6,5 feet tall, could even fit in it). From time to time he challenges Hammond and/or May on an 'epic race': basically the latter have to go faster than Clarkson who is driving some supercar. For instance, Clarkson drove an Aston Martin DB9 from the Top Gear base in England to Monaco, while May and Hammond were taking the train; Clarkson arrived first. Another time he headed for the Magnetic North Pole driving an equipped Toyota pickup truck, racing against Hammond who used a dog sled. Once again, Clarkson was successful, incidentally becoming the first man to reach the Magnetic North Pole with a car.
Of course Top Gear is not Jeremy Clarkson's only occupation: he married his agent in 1993 and got three children. In 1994 he created Top Gear Magazine, for which he regularly writes columns and reviews – most of which are collected and published as books later on. In the 1990s he took part in several other programmes such as the UK version of Robot Wars, he was the advocate of engineer Brunel for 100 Greatest Britons, and was was invited to many popular programmes like Friday Night with Jonathan Ross, Parkinson, Grumpy Old Men – Clarkson is precisely the epitome of a grumpy old man – and Never Mind the Buzzcocks. He also presented Top Gear specials (e.g. Jeremy Clarkson Meets The Neighbours and Apocalypse Clarkson) and his own chat show, Clarkson, between 1998 and 2000. He also presented several programmes about great engineering inventions and military deeds, such as Jeremy Clarkson: Greatest Raid of All Time, a documentary about a raid in Saint-Nazaire during WWII). In 2007 he was awarded the National Television Awards’ Special Recognition Award.
PS. Do not forget to browse through the Top Gear website and have a go at the 'Stupidly hard quiz'. PPS. Most of the hyperlinks will redirect you to a YouTube video.
"Well that was incredibly easy!" "Yes it was." "Can you imagine what it would have been like if we had walked the entire way?" "Don't be silly!" "One of us might have died!" "Hahahahahaha!"
What if George Lucas decided to make a re-mastered version of the classic Singin' in the Rain and add a very personal touch of his own in passing? Check this out to find out:
Now, how does the French dubbed version get away with this scene? I mean, how is the translator going to conceal a translation? Watch this excerpt from the French DVD version of the movie, with the original script as subtitles:
Yep, they simply cut off some lines, paraphrased or added script material… This scene could be a case study in translation studies, especially since the DVD-version adaptators had to deal with the fact that Truffaut was dead and obviously not available to dub himself, but still, they kept what he recorded back then.
Yup, it's finally been released about a dozen of days ago, and I completely forgot to check it out. Now that it's done, please have a look at it as well and enjoy it.
Only the Monty Python guys could invent that, obviously:
"The 27th Silly Olympiad, an event held traditionally every 3.7 years, which this year has brought together competitors from over 4 million different countries: - 100 yards for people with no sense of direction - 1500 meters for the deaf - 200 meters freestyle for non-swimmers - Marathon for incontinents - High jump - 3000 meter steeplechase for people who think they're chickens"
The 2008 Summer Olympics in Beijing have already begun, so I thought it was high time I showed you this video: Philippe Geluck attempting to break the long jump record…
This scene from the (unfortunately) unknown comedy film Good Burger is dedicated to those of you who have a student job this summer, and perhaps work in a fast food outlet:
"I'm reporting your name to the manager!" "The manager already knows my name!" "Oh! I'll see ya in HELL!" "OK. See you there!"
This test being successful, one cannot say that they "nuked the train" - just to make a reference to the newly coined expression "nuking the fridge", originating in an Indiana Jones IV scene.
"It is used to denote the point in a movie or movie series, usually one with a pre-established tone of only semi-seriousness, at which the characters or plot veer into an over-the-top level of the ridiculous or incredible, thus leaving one feeling alienated from the intention of the film."
Such tests seem to be common place, as shown in the various experiments that scientists make to test the solidity of the flasks.
— I was born on 12 February 1988 in Rocourt (in the municipality of Liège). I grew up in Aubel, then I studied in Herve (Collège Royal Marie-Thérèse). I took a bachelor's degree in Germanic languages (Dutch and English) in Namur, then I went to the KU Leuven to do a MA in Linguistics and Literature (Dutch and English). My main research interests are the translation of humour, intertextual references and multilingualism/heterolingualism.
// — I'm an Internet freak and fond of cinema.
// — I enjoy making (silly) comments on anything, grumpily bickering and nitpicking just like Statler from the Muppets.
// Why did you google my name, you nosy person?
"Tu veux ma photo, banane ?" (Biff Tannen, Back to the Future)
This picture was taken on 21 June 2007 while we were resting in front of a café in Damme. That day, just after the last exam of the first year, we had the opportunity to make a small excursion on a bike from Brugge to Damme.
My nicknames
Statler (coined by Prof. Lieven Vandelanotte) because I often make silly comments and crack jokes that nobody understands except my fellow Martin aka Waldorf
Statistics: number of visitors (starting on 5 November 2007)
Famous people I saw or met at least once (of course, nearly all of them come from Belgium)
Amélie Nothomb
André Flahaut
Anne-Marie Lizin
Arno
Axel Merckx
Benoît Poelvoorde
Bernard Hinault
Bla-Bla (I admit I was a great fan of his shows…)
Bouli Lanners
Bruno Coppens
Christophe Brandt
Christopher Lloyd
Didier Reynders
Didier Van Cauwelaert
Dupa (Jean Dupanloup)
Eddy Merckx
Eric De Staerke
Fadilah Laanan
Frédéric Deborsu
Frédéric Jannin
Gilles Dal
Grand Duke
Gryzette
Guy Verhofstadt
Herman De Croo
Howard Shore
Isabelle Durant
Jacques Balutin
Jacques Mercier
Jean Piat
Jean-Claude Vancauwenberghe
Jean-Jacques Jespers
Jean-Luc Fonck
Jean-Marie Leblanc
Joëlle Milquet
Juan d'Oultremont
King Albert II
Kris Peeters
Lance Armstrong
Laurence Bibot
Les Gauff' (Au Suc')
Lorent Deutsch
Marc Moulin
Marie Arena
Miam Monster Miam
Nathalie Uffner
Nicolas Sarkozy
No that's a joke, I never saw him
Olivier Monsens
Paolo Bettini
Philippe Geluck
Philippe Lafontaine
Philippe Lambillon
Pierre Aucaigne
Pierre Kroll
Pierre Rapsat
Pino Cerami
Prince Laurent
Prince Philippe
Queen Fabiola
Queen Paola
Raoul Reyers (Philippe Gouders)
Rik Verbrugghe
Robbie McEwen
Robert Sabatier
Robert Wasseige
Rudy Demotte
Saint André (the singer!)
Sam Touzani
Sergio Honorez
Stefan Liberski
Thomas Gunzig
Tom Boonen
Virginie Hocq
Virginie Svensson
People I dislike or hate or that irritate me (a selection)
Benedict XVI (Religious Extremist)
Benoît Dreze (CDH) (He wants to promote the so-called "chèques-service" which encourage slavery — namely people doing the housework you should do on your own)
Condoleeza Rice (A Shame For Women)
Donald Rumsfeld (Republican Idiot)
Filip De Winter (VB)
George W. Bush (Supreme Moron)
H.M. Leopold III (traitor)
John-Paul II (fortunately he died)
José Happart (PS) (Complete nerd)
Justine Henin (Tennis Player)
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (Extremist)
Mgr Léonard (Intolerant, Religious Extremist, Mentally Deranged, Pillock)
Michael Schumacher (Dikke Nek)
Paul Wolfovitz (yeah, that guy who can't buy a new pair of socks but can help his girlfriend get a better job…)
The first meetings for Erasmus students took place in the Educatorium, Leuvenlaan 4 in De Uithof (i.e. the place where most of the campus lies). There were various workshops, e.g. culture, sports, administration, ESN (Erasmus Students Network), etc.
Magali smiles but doesn't wave.
This is the Casa Confetti, a block of student flats.
A "fietspad"; admire how flat and perfect they are — there's a world of difference between those bike paths and the Belgian ones!
The Utrecht University logo on top of a building.
The Oudegracht, apparently the oldest canal in the city.
On the left you can see the city hall and the Dom (i.e. the cathedral) in the centre.
Same thing.
Magali on this… whatever you name it. We had a long ride on it to discover some of the city's most important places.
No comment.
A picture of the group of exchange students Magali and I were with during the orientation day organised by ESN. We were in front of the oldest administrative building of the University, just next to the Dom.
Magali's room when I was temporarily staying there. Admire my camp bed on the left.
My new room, but that you already know.
Some nice old Dutch locomotives in front of the Spoorwegmuseum.
I still have to visit that museum, but so far I haven't really had the time.
On Monday 22 September ESN organised a "night canoeing", so I decided to attend it with Magali. In the picture you can (perhaps) see some of the canoes that we dragged on a bank in order to have a drink at a café.
(The Dom.)
Don't worry if you can't see anything.
Files…
That's it! I hope you enjoyed!
