Some LOTR stuff

A new kind of comics has appeared: you take stills from any movies (in this case from the Lord of the Rings trilogy) and you add texts. But since people (and myself) are never serious, the texts get really silly…



"Why the hell are you looking at me like that? Fuck man this. I'm leaving. You're drunk again."

Beware of the seagulls!

If you happen to fly a plane (why not?), never fly too close to the beach, you never know:



Haha! Owned by retired 007!

"Chuk-chuk-chuk-chuk-chuk!" is one of the best lines in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. Another quote that I like is also said by Sean Connery, talking about his Grail journal: "I should have mailed it to the Marx Brothers..."

By the way, the film whose ending got alternated is Sky Captain (starring Gwyneth Paltrow and Jude Law), which I've never watched. Here's the original Indiana Jones scene:



"I suddenly remembered my Charlemagne: Let my armies be the rocks and the trees - and the birds in the sky."

I know I've already featured the following video, but I think it'd be nice for you to watch it once more:

"You built a time machine out of a car!"

Goldentusk, who made the Indiana Jones theme song which I featured some days ago, made several other theme songs. Today, I'd like to show you this one about the Back to the Future theme composed by Alan Silvestry. You might want to listen to the original version first:



And now, the parody:



Please (re)watch this Back to the Future rap which I featured last year:

Irritable kid

Warning: if you watch this video, you'll soil yourself because this proves to be more far beyond hilarious! I nearly fell off my chair…



LMAO ROFLOL, as they say. ;-)

This video actually combines three of the most famous Internet phenomena, namely Angry German Kid, Numa Numa Boy and Star Wars Kid. Here's the subtitled version of the Angry German Kid video:



I found this explanation in the descrption box:

Angry German Kid (a.k.a. Der echte Gangster, Slikk or Leopold) is a talented actor of age 15 from Bergisches Land, Germany. He plays a character, Der echte Gangster, a parody of a wannabe gangster. This fact has often been misunderstood, and as a result he has been subject to bullying both on- and offline (e.g. school). For this very reason, he stopped making videos for almost a year in 2006. (…) This video was made as a response to some German politicians attempting to restrict access to violent video games. He was trying to show how they view gamers. Very amusing and intelligent. Too bad most people missed the point.

Brilliant acting, then!



Today's Uncyclopedia featured articles: Star Wars Kid and Numa Numa Boy, for your personal information. There's no entry on Angry German Kid.

Bonus (for having read till here): if you've got a wicked mind, check out a video I posted on Statler and Waldorf's outrageous blog.

Hitler's car

I wanted to show you a very funny scene from this relatively unknown movie called Rat Race, which stars Rowan Atkinson, Whoopi Goldberg, Cuba Gooding, Jr., Jon Lovitz, Seth Green, John Cleese and Wayne Knight, among others. In order to contextualise the video, please read this summary of the Pear family, retrieved on Wikipedia:

Randy Pear (Jon Lovitz) is on a family vacation with his wife, Bev (Kathy Najimy), son, Jason (Brody Smith), and daughter, Kimberly (Jillian Marie Hubert). Desperate to get rich so he doesn't have to work at Home Depot any more, he joins the race without telling Bev or his children why they are rushing from Las Vegas. He instead informs them that he has a job interview in Silver City for filling ink pens. He is so desperate to get there that he does not stop to allow the kids to go to the toilet, having Kimmie excrete out the window, where it hits a police car. The daughter then spots a sign saying "Barbie Museum", and Bev insists that they have to stop and give the kids a break. Randy reluctantly agrees. The barbie museum turns out to not be about the doll, however, and instead a shrine to the Nazi Klaus Barbie run by neo-nazis. The Pear Family, who is Jewish, flees in terror, only to find their car has been sabotaged by the Cody Brothers. So Randy steals nothing less than Adolf Hitler's car from the museum and they drive that.

"Are you insane? This is Hitler's car!"

I found an extended version of the scene, but it's in German. Notice that Mr. Pear curses German cars…

"We have to attend a bookburning…"

Now let's make fun of evil Hitler: someone took one of the scenes from Der Untergang and put fake humorous subtitles on it…


"Everyone that's not a retard leaves the room now" --> LMAO

Uncyclopedia featured articles: one of the leaders of the Axis of Evil-Doers, Adolf Hitler, and Benedict XVI (aka Darth Ratzi, Palpatine's best friend).

Hitler, keeping his pimp hand strong, "You must be this tall to join the Nazi party".

Final Destination 2

Final Destination 2 features one of the best crash scenes in all the action movies I've seen so far:



And for those of you who are afraid to go to the dentist's:

Dutch voice-over

See what happens when James Cameron's Titanic is voiced over in Dutch:

What's the quickest way? Train or Aston Martin?

Jeremy Clarkson, James May and Richard Hammond organise an epic race from Surrey to Monaco to see if taking the trip in an Aston Martin DB9 is faster than taking the train. How silly they are! But that's the whole point, I think.

"Rarely I practise what I preach, that was why I was born to teach"

Since we're in a kind of Indy week, I propose you watch this brilliant song parody based on the Raiders March theme by the god of composers, John Williams. Let's watch first a music video with fragments from the first three films.



Parody by goldentusk:

"If you want to get to work quickly, get a table"

Infamous presentor Jeremy Clarkson introduces us to the G-Wiz, a really crappy electric car:



"This has no redeeming features, it has no headroom, it has no leg room, it has no space for a passenger alongside me and God has not yet created a creature who would fit in the back! (…) You can't stop cause that'll wear the battery down… (…) The message then is clear: if you want to die horribly and in great pain while keeping Britain wet and miserable, get a G-Wiz. If on the other hand you want something strong, and safe and quite a lot faster than a G-Wiz, get yourself a table."

A crash test:

In-D-Day

Indiana Jones hit the screen today in Belgium, and since I'm one of his biggest fans I had to go and see the movie today. So I decided to take a break in this rather long and tiresome period preceding the first exam and I went to the cinema. I was expecting a huge crowd of Indy freaks, but it appeared that only two dozens of people had come! Anyway, that's not a problem.

I really enjoyed Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, but I won't write a lot about it right now, because I'm running out of time and because I prefer not to disclose to much information about the plot and so on. I'd just like to say that this film won't appeal to people who have never seen the other episodes, for it's full of references and "Easter eggs". The plot was terrific, except that a couple of scenes were too unrealistic… Yet, this film was great and I'm looking forward to seeing it once more after the exams. If you liked the other Indiana Jones movies, go to the cinema asap!

I suppose most of you won't have the opportunity to go to the cinema before a month or so, and that's why I thought that listening to John William's great music would be fine meanwhile. I hope you'll notice the many hints to the other films.

Raiders' March:



Journey to Akator:



Finale:

Bugsy and Mugsy

Let me show you this classic cartoon featuring Bugs Bunny and the infamous bandits Rocky and Mugsy.

01-GBB-1

I bet you're wondering right now what this entry's title refers to. In fact it is the first instance of the new Dutch licence plate code that has just been released yesterday by the RDW (Rijksdienst Wegverkeer, whose Belgian equivalent is the DIV – Direction pour l'Immatriculation des Véhicules / Dienst voor de Inschrijving van de Voertuigen).

Several months ago, I remember mentioning the fact that the RDW had started issuing the last letter of the so-called "side-code 6" (i.e. the "99-XX-XX" type, with two digits followed by two groups of two letters). For months, Dutch people had been wondering when the new series would be issued, which had a negative impact on the sales of new cars, since everyone was waiting for the introduction of that new code.

Indeed, each vehicule in the Netherlands (except for bicycles) gets a licence plate that will always stay on it, even if the vehicule is sold, etc. In Belgium, quite the contrary, licence plates are linked to a person, so when s/he buys a new vehicule, s/he may keep the same plate number. (This stems from the fact that you can still spot so many of those old licence plates that you can hardly read…) Anyway, let's get back to the Netherlands: car sales diminished due to people waiting to the new code. The reason is that, when you have a car with a former "side code" (e.g. 22-SL-XP), it will immediately strike as older than the current "side code" (e.g. 39-GBG-7), which is a psychological obstacle for a possible future buyer.

Anyway. My point was to share that piece of useless information with you. For more details, I refer you to the following article:

01-GBB-1: na 57 jaar verandert kenteken personenauto
Zoetermeer, 19 mei 2008
Vandaag verschijnt na 57 jaar een volledig nieuw kenteken op de personenauto’s. Verkeersminister Camiel Eurlings reikt samen met Johan Hakkenberg, algemeen directeur van de RDW, het eerste personenautokenteken uit met twee cijfers, drie letters en één cijfer. De energiezuinige Volkswagen Golf van de heer Antonides uit Ermelo draagt het kenteken 01-GBB-1. De uitreiking vindt om 11.00 uur plaats bij het Instituut voor Automobiel Management (IVA) in Driebergen.


Nieuwe combinatie na 57 jaar
Voor het eerst bestaat het kenteken uit twee cijfers, drie letters en één cijfer. Deze combinatie is in 2002 na onderzoek van TNO naar voren gekomen als de best te lezen en te onthouden combinatie. Vanaf 1951 gebruikte Nederland alleen tweetallen van letters en cijfers. 57 jaar later zijn alle geschikte kentekencombinaties hiervan op. Met de nieuwe combinatie kunnen ongeveer 3 miljoen voertuigen een nieuw kenteken krijgen. De RDW is onder meer verantwoordelijk voor het beheer van het kentekenregister en de afgifte en inname van kentekenplaten.


Unieke registratiewijze
Het kenteken is belangrijk voor de handhaving van verkeersveiligheid en de opsporing van criminaliteit. Via het kenteken zijn immers alle technische gegevens en de gegevens van de eigenaar/houder te achterhalen. Hierdoor kan die aangesproken worden op zijn weggedrag, de technische staat van zijn voertuig, de verzekeringsplicht, de APK-plicht en motorrijtuigenbelasting. Ook bij andere vormen van criminaliteit is het kenteken een goed hulpmiddel om de dader te achterhalen. Al met al een unieke registratiewijze waar het buitenland met bewondering naar kijkt.
Daarnaast speelt het kenteken en het kentekenregister een rol in ‘Anders Betalen voor Mobiliteit’. Daarom is het van groot belang om een betrouwbaar en fraudebestendig kentekenregister te hebben.

Goed vastschroeven
Omdat er zoveel afhankelijk is van het kenteken, vindt minister Eurlings het belangrijk dat iedereen de kentekenplaat goed vastzet om het risico van diefstal of verlies te verkleinen. “Er verschijnen regelmatig berichten dat steeds meer kentekenplaten gestolen worden. Dat is linke soep, dan moet je zelf nieuwe kentekenplaten aanvragen om niet op te draaien voor overtredingen die een ander met jouw kenteken begaat. Daarom zal ik deze nieuwe kentekenplaat extra goed vastschroeven.”

Verboden combinaties
In de nieuwe cijfer-lettercombinatie worden helemaal geen klinkers gebruikt. Ook de letter Y doet niet mee. Gebruik van klinkers maakt de kans op maatschappelijk onaanvaardbare of grievende lettercombinaties te groot. Ook worden de letters C en Q niet gebruikt, omdat deze letters teveel op een nul lijken. De W en O staan alleen als eerste letter op de plaat van een caravan, aanhangwagen of een oplegger. Daarnaast worden ook de zes lettercombinaties GVD, NSB, TBS, LYK, SS en SD niet gebruikt.

Source: nummerplaat.com

I'd like to point out that Belgian licence plate will undergo a great change this year (I predict that to happen in October): the two groups of three letters and three digits will be reversed, resulting in plates like "111-AAA". Note that the first group will never start with a zero so as to avoid confusion with the letter O (used for oldtimers). However, it seems that almost no one knows about this change, so it won't have an effect on car sales as in the Netherlands. Isn't that
a bit weird? (Yeah I know: I am weird.)

James Bond has an adept:



I found a video commenting on the proposal of a Tweede Kamerlid to allow car owners to get vanity plates. The reporter investigates in a licence plate factory.

The Watch

The "watch scene" is one of my favourite ones in Pulp Fiction: Captain Kroon's monologue played by Christopher Walken.



"He'd be damned if any slope's gonna put his greasy yellow hands on his son's birthright. So he hid it in one place he knew he can hide something: his ass."

--> Brilliant line!

Here's the French version of the same scene, with Walken dubbed by Bernard Lanneau, who is the "official French voice" of Kevin Costner and Dennis Quaid.

Donnie the Entertainer

Let's make fun of ex-US Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld:



Here's evidence that Donnie's an expert in martial arts:



Today's Uncyclopedia featured article: Donald Rumsfeld as you could expect.

The Wearing of the Grin

Perhaps I should have thought about it on St Patrick's Day, but it's only today that I've had the idea to google the following video on YouTube. It stars Porky Pig who is looking high and low for refuge in Ireland, and he ends up in a castle owned by leprechauns… (According to Uncyclopedia, leprechauns are "little magical hoppity green creatures commonly confused with the Irish.")




"Le-le-le-le-leprechauns! What nonsense!"

I love Porky's look at 03:42. The green shoes dance is just fantastic, by the way.

"I really must be going… I'm late for an appointment… with me-me-my psychiatrist…"

That was a quite surreal cartoon, don't you think?

Wikipedia trivia:

"The title refers to The Wearing of the Green, an old Irish ballad, while the green shoes themselves are borrowed from the Hans Christian Anderson fable The Red Shoes (and the 1948 film based on it) about a pair of ballet shoes that never let their wearer stop dancing."

Today's Uncyclopedia featured articles: midget, Ewok, Oompah Loompah, Dwarfs, Hobbit, Penguins, Tom Cruise. And the Miget cockpunching terrorists, as a bonus.

Top that, PCs!

The following video proves that Apple computers have the upper hand as far as advanced technology is concerned:







All right, I admit it's totally useless, but let's hope that Sudden Motion Sensors will be made usefull use of in the future.

Before leaving you, another silly application for Star Wars geeks and nerds: MacSaber.



I found a "fight" that's even worse than Star Wars Kid…

"I need to go to the toilet!" (Andy Pipkin, Little Britain)

Going to the toilet isn't a nightmare anymore for women who are afraid of germs on the seat:



It was unavoidable that I show you, after the world's cleanest toilet, the world's most disgusting "toilet":



"Ants, beetles, mosquitos, fleas, spiders… Oh! Several congrate! (…) A toad! (…) And we've got toilet paper!" / "That's a shit box!"

Yet, there's hope: the Viper, the state of the art in the domain of flushing huge piles of [INSERT WORD HERE]:



For those of you who think they waste a lot of clean water when flushing, the following video will prove that you're wrong: it is possible to waste more. Check this out

A comment on YouTube:

"That's not a toilet that's a washing machine" --> So true!



Today's Uncyclopedia featured article: the toilet (and the Pee Review, as a bonus)

This blog entry's title refers to the following sketch from Little Britain:



There's another one involving the bathroom:

Batman returns (I mean he's back)

Remember the first Batman: The Dark Knight trailer?



A very gifted film editor on YouTube came up with this re-cut trailer: shots from Tim Burton's 1989 Batman with the audio from The Dark Knight.



Wasn't that brilliant? According to me, the best bits is "Why so serious?" and "I like that": Jack Nicholson's facial expression is perfectly tuned with the audio.

The second trailer has eventually been released, so enjoy it!



The Joker (Heath Ledger) kicks ass! (but not for the Lord…) There's also a hint about district attorney Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart) becoming Two-Face… Did you spot that as well?

The "Dead Parrot sketch" revisited

Please watch this other version of the Dead Parrot sketch that was performed by John Cleese and Michael Palin at the first Amnesty International Secret Policeman's Ball in 1976:





You'll be surprised by the following version: