I had the idea of googling "Lada jokes" on Google, and here are some great jokes I found on a website about these crappy cars of which Jeremy Clarkson made fun in an episode of Top Gear, remember.
You don't need to read all of them (obviously: one should not have too much of a good thing…).
Q: Which is the biggest society of belivers?.A couple of French jokes:
A: The Lada owners, they all belive they have a car!
Q: What's the difference between a Lada and a Jehovah's Witness?
A: You can close the door on a Jehovah's Witness.
Did you hear about the bloke who had his Lada broken into?
The thieves put him a radio in!
Q: What do you call a Lada going up a hill?
A: A bloody miracle.
Somewhere in the middle of Spain, a Lada is driving along and meets a donkey.
The donkey, never having seen a Lada before, asks: "What are you?"
The Lada says "I am a car. What are you?"
The donkey says "Hahahaha... If you're a car, I'm a horse!"
Heard of Lada's new turbo model?
It has pedals in the backseat, too!
Q: How do you make a Lada worth twice as much?
A: You fill up the gas tank.
Q: Why is the Lada's rear window heated?
A: So the hands of the people pushing it will not freeze.
Q: How do you make a Lada disappear?
A: You spray it with rust remover!
A Lada can reach a speed of 125 mph… if it's transported on the railway!
Did you know that the Lada's instruction book contains 500 pages?
There are two pages with information about the car and 498 pages with bus and train timetables.
Q: Why do insurance companies enjoy Lada's?
A: They are never stolen.
Q: Why is there light under the Lada's bonnet?
A: So you can fix it 24 hours a day.
Q: There is a new 16 valve Lada.
A: It has 8 in the engine, and 8 in the radio.
My cousin was unemployed. Then he became a Lada salesman.
He is still unemployed, but now we understand why
Q: Do you know what all the Lada owners are dreaming about?
A: Getting a ticket for speeding.
From a newspaper: To the man who stole my Lada in 20 degrees of frost.
Keep the Lada, but please tell me how you started it!
Did you know that there are only two men working in the Lada factory?
One with scissors and one with glue.
Q: Do you know what the trip counter in the Lada says when it's passing 20,000 miles?
A: Game Over!
Q: What's the difference between a Lada and a golf ball?
A: You can drive a golf ball 200 metres.
--> Brilliant, but impossible to translate that into French!
Q: What do you call a Lada that starts first time?
A: A novelty.
Q: What do you call a Lada that overtakes you?
A: A mirage.
Q: What to you call a Lada with brakes?
A: Customised.
Q : Pourquoi deux conducteurs de Lada se reconnaissent immédiatement lorsqu'ils se rencontrent ?
R : Ils se sont vus le matin au garage.
Q : Combien peux-tu mettre de personnes dans une Lada ??
R : Tout dépend de la taille de la dépanneuse.
